¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

It was a fantastic trip ever in Jeju Island!

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2024-12-26 772

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I was worried before the trip, because the weather would be cold, windy and snowy severely!

The first day was as bad as the weather forecast. It was super windy and suddenly hailed!
So we were very worried that each other's body condition got worse because my friend caught a cold before the trip.

However, the other days was sunny! (It was still windy but it was okay to travel.)
So we enjoyed the scenery of camellias, visited the traditional market at the second day.

Also we visited a famous pork cutlet restaurant at third day.
We waited since 9 am even though the open time was 12 pm! (Fortunately we could receive waiting ticket at 10 am)
And we came back to this restaurant at 2 pm, and enjoyed our meals.
It was delicious because the sauce is different from any other restaurants. We guessed that the chef make his own sauce

And we visited snoopy garden at final day.
I hope to visit there again in spring or summer, because there will be more beautiful with various flowers!

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there again, Min!

All is well that ends well. You planned your trip, you went there, and finally had a blast! I am so glad that your itineraries went well in spite of all the weather advisory.

As promised, you made a composition of all the activities that you enjoyed and I could not be happier that your completed all the destinations of the restaurants and the camellias which were on top of your list. The next time you go to Jeju Island, you will have a different set of activities and places to discover. Keep your curiosity and adventurous spirit alive!

As you can see with your lengthy piece of writing, you were able to compose so many correct sentences. Always study carefully the suggestions made and make sure you know use them correctly on your next composition. overall, it was excellent!

See you again here next time!

-T. Donna~

I was worried before the trip, because the weather would be cold, windy and snowy severely!
>>  Correct!

The first day was as bad as the weather forecast. It was super windy and suddenly hailed!
So we were very worried that each other's body condition got worse because my friend caught a cold before the trip.
>>  Correct! Very good sentences!

However, the other days was sunny! (It was still windy but it was okay to travel.)
So we enjoyed the scenery of camellias, visited the traditional market at the second day.
>> However, the other days were sunny! (It was still windy but it was okay to travel.)
So we enjoyed the scenery of camellias and visited the traditional market at the second day.


Also we visited a famous pork cutlet restaurant at third day.
We waited since 9 am even though the open time was 12 pm! (Fortunately we could receive waiting ticket at 10 am)
And we came back to this restaurant at 2 pm, and enjoyed our meals.
It was delicious because the sauce is different from any other restaurants. We guessed that the chef make his own sauce
>> Also we visited a famous pork cutlet restaurant at the third day.
We waited since 9 am even though the opening time was 12 pm! (Fortunately we could receive the waiting ticket at 10 am)
And we came back to this restaurant at 2 pm, and enjoyed our meals.
It was delicious because the sauce is different from any other restaurants. We guessed that the chef make his own sauce.



And we visited snoopy garden at final day.
>> And, we visited the Snoopy Garden at the final day.

I hope to visit there again in spring or summer, because there will be more beautiful with various flowers!
>> I hope to visit there again in spring or summer because it will be more beautiful with various flowers!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
134652 How does spending time at the beach contribute to your... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 2040
134651 Should adults with jobs still live with their parents but pay... ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 2
134650 What are the major events you have with your family/ friends/... ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 1
134649 The best thing in Japan ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 1981
134648 When you travel what do you prioritize? Why? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-14 1
134647 When can you say, ¡°It¡¯s a crime to do nothing¡±? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-13 1587
134646 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-02-13 1599
134645 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-02-13 1078
134644 Do you like camping? ÃÖ*ÇÑ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-13 1758
134643 I miss you a lot!! ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-13 3
134642 homework 02.13 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-02-13 2074
134641 What are the five basic tastes? ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-02-13 1
134640 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-13 202
134639 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-13 2
134638 Why living forever is not so good ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-13 0
134637 Do you like meeting new people? ¼­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-13 1007
134636 If you were asked to work in the weekend with a good... ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-13 1553
134635 What are your top priorities in looking for a job? (ex: salary,... õ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-02-13 1404
134634 Why is it beneficial to take part in school organizations/clubs? õ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-02-13 1903
134633 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-13 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04