¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2024-12-18 3

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q: What is more important to take care of: mental health or physical health?
A: I think mental health would be more important to take care of.
If one don't take care of physical health much, he would feel sick and maybe get hurt easily, but it is temporary.
But if one don't take care of mental health, the misery would remain for a long time.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Paul!
I understand your point. Thank you for sharing your thoughts!
~ Teacher Trixia

CONTENT:
I think mental health would be more important to take care of.
- I think mental health is more important to take care of. 
If one don't take care of physical health much, he would feel sick and maybe get hurt easily, but it is temporary.
- If someone doesn't take care of their physical health, they might feel sick or get injured easily, but that is usually temporary. 
But if one don't take care of mental health, the misery would remain for a long time.
- However, if someone neglects their mental health, the distress can last much longer.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141559 How do you reward yourself after completing a workout? ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 7
141558 Homework ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 3
141557 In your opinion, what is the best age to be? What is good about... Àå*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 1
141556 Write about the topic, ¡°How music enhances storytelling in... ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 5
141555 HOMEWORK FOR 12.18.2024 DIRECTIONS: Please make sentences using... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 2
141554 homework ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 1
141553 Against SNS ÀÓ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 11
141552 Homework ¾È*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 5
141551 How do you make friends with other kids? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 5
141550 People select their favorit brand for anything ÀÌ*Çü ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 14
141549 Page 19 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 1
141548 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 9
141547 Why do you want to be an Aircraft Engineer? ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 5
141546 Which is better for effective learning, online or traditional... ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 7
141545 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 1
141544 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 11
141543 Homework ÇÑ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 1
141542 Homework & Question ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 14
141541 Do you think that one day, weddings will become a thing of the... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 1
141540 How do you make sure to end a conversation in a polite and... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04