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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

What other things do you want from your government to do for the doctors?

작성자: 차*환
2024-12-13 26

회원님의 영작문

The medical system of South Korea has been destroyed after the strike of residents and interns. Furthermore, this serious situation appears to be continuded until next year, because most of medical students leaved the school. A lot of professors and nurses who have been taking on interns' work are already exhausted.

I think the government should change their policy to rapidly increase the number of medical student. We need more detailed discussion about this issue including consensus meetings with step-by-step manners. Furthermore, I also suggest that more effective financial support should be required for the so-called "essential medicines" such as thoracic surgery or pediatric departments.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello there, Dr. David!

I could not agree more with your ideas. Since you have been a in your profession for a long time, you know exactly how it needs to develop and qualify doctors who will serve and protect the dignity and reputation of your field. This issue has been ongoing for a while and if no immediate action will be done, it may be detrimental to your citizens.

What can be some of the steps possible for your recovery? Will your next president be putting emphasis to this medical issues? Time will tell all the answers to these. Meanwhile, stay strong and I hope that you can cope will all these adversities right now.

You only had a few suggestions. Study them carefully. See you tomorrow.

-T. Donna ~

The medical system of South Korea has been destroyed after the strike of residents and interns. Furthermore, this serious situation appears to be continuded until next year, because most of medical students leaved the school. A lot of professors and nurses who have been taking on interns' work are already exhausted.
>> The medical system of South Korea has been destroyed after the strike of residents and interns. Furthermore, this serious situation appears to continue until next year because most medical students left the school. A lot of professors and nurses who have been taking on interns' work are already exhausted.

I think the government should change their policy to rapidly increase the number of medical student. We need more detailed discussion about this issue including consensus meetings with step-by-step manners. Furthermore, I also suggest that more effective financial support should be required for the so-called "essential medicines" such as thoracic surgery or pediatric departments.
>>  I think the government should change their policy to rapidly increase the number of medical student. We need a more detailed discussion about this issue including consensus meetings with step-by-step process. Furthermore, I also suggest that more effective financial support should be required for the so-called "essential medicines" such as thoracic surgery or pediatric departments.
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