¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What changes would you like to see in your country\'s educational system? Why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÇÑ*¿¬
2024-12-10 260

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I want to see changes for national college entrance exam in our country education.
Because it is only one chance to show our intelligence.
We have studied for it about 12 years.
But, If we don't have a good condition for that day, we would be so embrassed of it.
It is also part of studying to make a good condition, but I don't like this system.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë


Hello Nicole,
Thank you for submitting your composition. You are doing well. Keep it up!
~ T. Demi ^^


I want to see changes for national college entrance exam in our country education.
>>I want to see changes to the national college entrance exam in our country's education system.
Because it is only one chance to show our intelligence.
>> It is only one chance to demonstrate our intelligence.
We have studied for it about 12 years.
>> We have studied for it for about 12 years.
But, If we don't have a good condition for that day, we would be so embrassed of it.
>> However, if we are not in good condition on that day, we might feel very embarrassed.
It is also part of studying to make a good condition, but I don't like this system.
>> While preparing ourselves to be in good condition is part of studying, I still dislike this system.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
140692 What does being \"rich\" or \"wealthy\" mean to you personally?... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-29 790
140691 How much do you think your job defines who you are as a person? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-29 827
140690 How does the affordability of public transportation influence... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-29 860
140689 Have you ever hosted a family gathering at your home? What was... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-29 745
140688 Enough time ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-29 762
140687 Have you ever had a bad shopping experience? what happened? À§*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-29 1
140686 Are there any traditional dishes form your culture that you... À§*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-29 1
140685 What do you think is the most important traffic rule to follow... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-28 877
140684 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-10-28 729
140683 Why is it important to follow guidelines and principles? ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-10-28 629
140682 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-28 1
140681 28Oct2024_homework ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-10-28 725
140680 home work Àå*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-28 728
140679 How much time do you spend outdoors every week? ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-10-28 1425
140678 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-28 758
140677 Hi sharon ¾î*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-28 1
140676 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Most... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-10-28 773
140675 what place can be like home? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-28 768
140674 I want to visit all badminton gym Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-28 12
140673 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-28 669

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04