¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Write about how you cope with your fears.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³ë*ö
2024-12-06 382

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

There are fears that you can work hard to get rid of and there are fears that cannot be removed no matter how hard I try.
In case of fear of height, it does not disappear no matter how hard you try.
In my case, I tried to adapt.
As I adjusted from a short height, I tried to know how high I could actually endure.
It can be reduced to some extent, but there is absolutely no solution.
However, almost all fears encountered in life can be eliminated.
First, we must understand the nature of fear.
Many people are afraid of the unsettling future to come.
I've had the same experience a lot.
But almost all of the fears I met never occurred.
And actually the fear that will arise in the future wasn't actually a fear that could be prevented no matter how hard I tried.
In the end, it doesn't change even if I care about fear.
If I meet fear, my solution is to work hard on what I have to do today.
That is the way to overcome fear and prepare for the future.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi David, I just finished reading your essay about fear, and I really enjoyed it. Your insights about how fear can be both manageable and persistent were thought-provoking. I especially liked how you shared your personal experiences, like trying to adapt and face your fear of heights. It made the essay relatable and inspiring. Great job!

~ T. Lia

There are fears that you can work hard to get rid of and there are fears that cannot be removed no matter how hard I try.
>> There are fears you can work hard to overcome, and there are fears that cannot be eliminated no matter how hard I try.

In case of fear of height, it does not disappear no matter how hard you try.
>> In the case of a fear of heights, it does not disappear no matter how hard you try.

In my case, I tried to adapt.
>> CORRECT

As I adjusted from a short height, I tried to know how high I could actually endure.
>>As I adjusted to greater heights, I tried to determine how high I could actually endure.

It can be reduced to some extent, but there is absolutely no solution.
>> It can be reduced to some extent, but there is no absolute solution.

However, almost all fears encountered in life can be eliminated.
>> CORRECT

First, we must understand the nature of fear.
>> CORRECT

Many people are afraid of the unsettling future to come.
>> Many people are afraid of the uncertain future.

I've had the same experience a lot.
>> I¡¯ve had similar experiences many times.

But almost all of the fears I met never occurred.
>> But almost all of the fears I imagined never came true.

And actually the fear that will arise in the future wasn't actually a fear that could be prevented no matter how hard I tried.
>> And the fear I anticipated for the future wasn¡¯t something that could be prevented, no matter how hard I tried.

In the end, it doesn't change even if I care about fear.
>> In the end, nothing changes even if I dwell on my fears.

If I meet fear, my solution is to work hard on what I have to do today.
>> When I face fear, my solution is to focus on working hard on what I need to do today.

That is the way to overcome fear and prepare for the future.
>> CORRECT

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
140234 Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 908
140233 Should more people use public transport instead of cars or... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 982
140232 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 1025
140231 What kind of people are less likely to suffer from stress or... ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 4
140230 I agree with that idea Àü*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 1036
140229 What do you do when you are exhausted? Àå*±¸ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 1049
140228 Sleep ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 1002
140227 In which company do you wish to work for a long time? What... Àå*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 993
140226 My homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-03 766
140225 Who plays a more substantial role in a person\'s life, family or... ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-03 1108
140224 Homework ¾È*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-03 988
140223 My homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-03 793
140222 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-03 3
140221 Topics ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-03 926
140220 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-03 1
140219 >> What are some essential tips for hosting a memorable pajama... ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-10-03 4
140218 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-03 0
140217 Are you or anyone you know allergic to any food? What happens if... ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-10-03 1018
140216 Writing task: What is the best place for a vacation in your... ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-03 978
140215 Has social media made it easier to get famous? Is this good or... ¹Ú*½Ä ¿Ï·á 2024-10-03 986

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04