¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Write about how you cope with your fears.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³ë*ö
2024-12-06 172

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

There are fears that you can work hard to get rid of and there are fears that cannot be removed no matter how hard I try.
In case of fear of height, it does not disappear no matter how hard you try.
In my case, I tried to adapt.
As I adjusted from a short height, I tried to know how high I could actually endure.
It can be reduced to some extent, but there is absolutely no solution.
However, almost all fears encountered in life can be eliminated.
First, we must understand the nature of fear.
Many people are afraid of the unsettling future to come.
I've had the same experience a lot.
But almost all of the fears I met never occurred.
And actually the fear that will arise in the future wasn't actually a fear that could be prevented no matter how hard I tried.
In the end, it doesn't change even if I care about fear.
If I meet fear, my solution is to work hard on what I have to do today.
That is the way to overcome fear and prepare for the future.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi David, I just finished reading your essay about fear, and I really enjoyed it. Your insights about how fear can be both manageable and persistent were thought-provoking. I especially liked how you shared your personal experiences, like trying to adapt and face your fear of heights. It made the essay relatable and inspiring. Great job!

~ T. Lia

There are fears that you can work hard to get rid of and there are fears that cannot be removed no matter how hard I try.
>> There are fears you can work hard to overcome, and there are fears that cannot be eliminated no matter how hard I try.

In case of fear of height, it does not disappear no matter how hard you try.
>> In the case of a fear of heights, it does not disappear no matter how hard you try.

In my case, I tried to adapt.
>> CORRECT

As I adjusted from a short height, I tried to know how high I could actually endure.
>>As I adjusted to greater heights, I tried to determine how high I could actually endure.

It can be reduced to some extent, but there is absolutely no solution.
>> It can be reduced to some extent, but there is no absolute solution.

However, almost all fears encountered in life can be eliminated.
>> CORRECT

First, we must understand the nature of fear.
>> CORRECT

Many people are afraid of the unsettling future to come.
>> Many people are afraid of the uncertain future.

I've had the same experience a lot.
>> I¡¯ve had similar experiences many times.

But almost all of the fears I met never occurred.
>> But almost all of the fears I imagined never came true.

And actually the fear that will arise in the future wasn't actually a fear that could be prevented no matter how hard I tried.
>> And the fear I anticipated for the future wasn¡¯t something that could be prevented, no matter how hard I tried.

In the end, it doesn't change even if I care about fear.
>> In the end, nothing changes even if I dwell on my fears.

If I meet fear, my solution is to work hard on what I have to do today.
>> When I face fear, my solution is to focus on working hard on what I need to do today.

That is the way to overcome fear and prepare for the future.
>> CORRECT

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141192 HOMEWORK FOR 11.27.2024 WRITING TASK: How can a person stay... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-27 3
141191 How can being brave help you in life? ¹è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2024-11-27 216
141190 Homework ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-27 242
141189 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-11-27 212
141188 What are you most excited about when it comes to opening your... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-27 240
141187 Just in case, send the file and answer in 2 sentences together ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-27 206
141186 People admire the life of influencers at social media\'s feed. ÀÌ*Çü ¿Ï·á 2024-11-27 212
141185 How much free time do you usually have every day? ÀÌ*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2024-11-27 2
141184 My English book ÀÌ*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-11-27 3
141183 Homework ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 1
141182 If you could switch careers with someone famous for a day, who... ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 253
141181 Which country would be the most enjoyable to live in? What makes... Àå*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 4
141180 Which is the best activity for tourism, domestic or... ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 228
141179 What is more important to take care of: mental health or... Àå*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 4
141178 Hom work ½Å*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 243
141177 What do you think is the best way to end a weekend? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 246
141176 How can we be good friends to others? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 2
141175 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 0
141174 How do you choose which movie to watch? By the genre? The... ¹Ú*½Ä ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 220
141173 Very common, Very important ¾È*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04