¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Write about how you cope with your fears.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³ë*ö
2024-12-06 406

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

There are fears that you can work hard to get rid of and there are fears that cannot be removed no matter how hard I try.
In case of fear of height, it does not disappear no matter how hard you try.
In my case, I tried to adapt.
As I adjusted from a short height, I tried to know how high I could actually endure.
It can be reduced to some extent, but there is absolutely no solution.
However, almost all fears encountered in life can be eliminated.
First, we must understand the nature of fear.
Many people are afraid of the unsettling future to come.
I've had the same experience a lot.
But almost all of the fears I met never occurred.
And actually the fear that will arise in the future wasn't actually a fear that could be prevented no matter how hard I tried.
In the end, it doesn't change even if I care about fear.
If I meet fear, my solution is to work hard on what I have to do today.
That is the way to overcome fear and prepare for the future.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi David, I just finished reading your essay about fear, and I really enjoyed it. Your insights about how fear can be both manageable and persistent were thought-provoking. I especially liked how you shared your personal experiences, like trying to adapt and face your fear of heights. It made the essay relatable and inspiring. Great job!

~ T. Lia

There are fears that you can work hard to get rid of and there are fears that cannot be removed no matter how hard I try.
>> There are fears you can work hard to overcome, and there are fears that cannot be eliminated no matter how hard I try.

In case of fear of height, it does not disappear no matter how hard you try.
>> In the case of a fear of heights, it does not disappear no matter how hard you try.

In my case, I tried to adapt.
>> CORRECT

As I adjusted from a short height, I tried to know how high I could actually endure.
>>As I adjusted to greater heights, I tried to determine how high I could actually endure.

It can be reduced to some extent, but there is absolutely no solution.
>> It can be reduced to some extent, but there is no absolute solution.

However, almost all fears encountered in life can be eliminated.
>> CORRECT

First, we must understand the nature of fear.
>> CORRECT

Many people are afraid of the unsettling future to come.
>> Many people are afraid of the uncertain future.

I've had the same experience a lot.
>> I¡¯ve had similar experiences many times.

But almost all of the fears I met never occurred.
>> But almost all of the fears I imagined never came true.

And actually the fear that will arise in the future wasn't actually a fear that could be prevented no matter how hard I tried.
>> And the fear I anticipated for the future wasn¡¯t something that could be prevented, no matter how hard I tried.

In the end, it doesn't change even if I care about fear.
>> In the end, nothing changes even if I dwell on my fears.

If I meet fear, my solution is to work hard on what I have to do today.
>> When I face fear, my solution is to focus on working hard on what I need to do today.

That is the way to overcome fear and prepare for the future.
>> CORRECT

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
139903 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 3
139902 12.Sep.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 0
139901 Favorite god µµ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 1380
139900 Do you prefer a planned vacation or a spontaneous one? Why? ±è*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 1266
139899 Homework ³ë*ö ÁøÇàÁß 2024-09-13 1150
139898 HOMEWORK FOR 09.13.2024 WRITING TASK: What¡¯s the most annoying... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 3
139897 Which beverages do you think are the most popular in the world... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 1299
139896 Do you have any harmless bad habits? Do they annoy other people? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 1996
139895 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 1155
139894 Homework ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 3
139893 homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 1094
139892 The positive side of \"Are smartphones ruining our world?\" ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 1210
139891 How do you usually spend your Chuseok holiday? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 0
139890 home work ½Å*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 1217
139889 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 1163
139888 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 958
139887 What do you think is the most mysterious planet? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 1368
139886 What do you think of the proverb, \"beauty is in the eye of the... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 2
139885 An adjective to describe me is .. ÀÌ*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 2
139884 Q) What did you like about school when you were a child? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04