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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

What do you think a nation be like without a president?

작성자: 최*연
2024-12-05 1648

회원님의 영작문

The president plays a central role in maintaining national stability, improving the lives of the people, and running the country effectively. However, the president's individual competence and leadership, as well as democratic procedures and checks, are important for these roles to be accomplished effectively.
Ironically, when I was in high school, the president was impeached, and no one thought he had been okay with politics since then. Nevertheless, I think the country is running because there is a system. Therefore, even if the president is vacant, I don't think the country will probably collapse. There is always a head of each department in the administration.
The rise and fall of the country may be determined by who the president is, but it is necessary to reduce its power by creating many checks.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Seo Yeon!!~
I read it completely, and I appreciate how you shared your real-life experience ^__^
Chammy

The president plays a central role in maintaining national stability, improving the lives of the people, and running the country effectively. 
OR
>> The president takes a pivotal role in governing and sustaining every aspect of one's nation.
However, the president's individual competence and leadership, as well as democratic procedures and checks, are important for these roles to be accomplished effectively.
OR
>> However, their ability/competence to effectively portray the position of a leader is necessary.
Ironically, when I was in high school, the president was impeached, and no one thought he had been okay with politics since then.
>> Correct
 Nevertheless, I think the country is running because there is a system. 
OR
>> I think the one's country is functioning because of its system.
Therefore, even if the president is vacant, I don't think the country will probably collapse. 
OR
>> As a result, even if the presidency does not exist, I believe the country will continue to thrive.
There is always a head of each department in the administration.
OR
>> The administration always has a department head.
The rise and fall of the country may be determined by who the president is, but it is necessary to reduce its power by creating many checks.
OR
>> The president may determine the country's rise and fall, but various balances must be put in place to limit its power.
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