¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³ë*ö
2024-11-29 578

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

A) In the past, my hobbies were reading, drawing. men's choir, writing, and playing classical guitar.
It seems that most of them were static activities.
Looking back at myself in elementary and middle school, I liked soccer very much, and when I was in elementary school student, I was a school soccer player.
Most of the hobbies I enjoyed as an adult, I started hobbies when I felt that my life was stagnant and I needed to change.
Through such hobby activities, I discover another talent of myself and these motivate me in life.
Whatever we do, over time, our work falls into mannerism.
I also lost the importance of my treatment and lost the appreciation of my life as a dentist because I have been doing dental work for a long time.
However, through these hobbies, I look back on my life and reorient myself.
When I have passion and goals through hobbies, I will become passionate about my job again and strive for better dental treatment.
My hobbies and jobs are always growing together.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

David, I truly appreciate your dedication and effort in completing your homework even when you're not feeling your best. It shows great strength and commitment, and I admire that so much. Your essay was thoughtful and well-written. You did a great job expressing your ideas to the best of your ability, and I can see how much effort you put into it. Keep up the excellent work, and remember to take care of yourself too. You're doing amazing!


~ T. Lia

In the past, my hobbies were reading, drawing. men's choir, writing, and playing classical guitar.
>> In the past, my hobbies were reading, drawing, men's choir, writing, and playing classical guitar.

It seems that most of them were static activities.
>> CORRECT

Looking back at myself in elementary and middle school, I liked soccer very much, and when I was in elementary school student, I was a school soccer player.
>> Looking back at myself in elementary and middle school, I liked soccer very much, and when I was an elementary school student, I was a school soccer player.

Most of the hobbies I enjoyed as an adult, I started hobbies when I felt that my life was stagnant and I needed to change.
>> Most of the hobbies I enjoyed as an adult, I started when I felt that my life was stagnant and I needed to change.

Through such hobby activities, I discover another talent of myself and these motivate me in life.
>> Through such hobby activities, I discover other talents within myself, and these motivate me in life.

Whatever we do, over time, our work falls into mannerism.
>> CORRECT

I also lost the importance of my treatment and lost the appreciation of my life as a dentist because I have been doing dental work for a long time.
>> I also lost the importance of my treatment and lost the appreciation of my life as a dentist because I had been doing dental work for a long time.

However, through these hobbies, I look back on my life and reorient myself.
>> CORRECT

When I have passion and goals through hobbies, I will become passionate about my job again and strive for better dental treatment.
>> When I have passion and goals through hobbies, I become passionate about my job again and strive for better dental treatment.

My hobbies and jobs are always growing together.
>> My hobbies and job are always growing together.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138108 2024.06.26 ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1
138107 Do you think buffet restaurants are worth their price? Why or... ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1414
138106 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1045
138105 What kind of roommate do you want to have ? ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 0
138104 eavesdrop ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 0
138103 Are you good at self-motivation? ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 0
138102 What is the importance of finding your passion? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1645
138101 Q) How does societal and cultural context influence perceptions... ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1
138100 June 24th homework ¾È*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1299
138099 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1
138098 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1262
138097 HOMEWORK FOR 06.25.2024 WRITING TASK: What do you do to save... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 2
138096 Do you like to go to the supermarket? How often do you go? ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1277
138095 hw ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1
138094 What do I spend my money on? ÇÑ*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 4
138093 What is the importance of finding your passion? ¿À*¼Ø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1
138092 How can you handle peer pressure while staying true to yourself... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1008
138091 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1185
138090 HOMEWORK FOR 06.21.2024 WRITING TASK: Do you believe in bad... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 4
138089 What kinds of crimes are increasing? Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 2026

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04