¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Which is the best activity for tourism, domestic or international travelling?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼Õ*Èñ
2024-11-26 1266

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Tourism is an important activity that offers people new experiences. Here are some arguments supporting that international travel is the best activity for tourism.
First, international travel provides a rich cultural experience. By immersing oneself in the unique traditions and languages of different countries, travelers can directly experience the diversity of the world. This greatly helps in broadening one¡¯s perspective and understanding various cultures. For example, visiting historic cities in Europe or exploring traditional villages in Asia offers invaluable experiences that cannot be obtained through domestic travel.
Second, looking at the numerical trends in international travel, we can see a rise in the number of overseas tourists in recent years. According to the attached graph, there were frequent instances where the number of overseas tourists exceeded 2,600,000 during certain periods. This indicates a growing demand for international travel.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Hana! This piece is great! The world is your stage so feel free to roam and learn. I appreciate the points you raised in this essay. Let us discuss more next time. See you!
--Teacher Anji


Tourism is an important activity that offers people new experiences. 
>> CORRECT
Here are some arguments supporting that international travel is the best activity for tourism.
>> CORRECT
First, international travel provides a rich cultural experience.
>> CORRECT
By immersing oneself in the unique traditions and languages of different countries, travelers can directly experience the diversity of the world. 
>> CORRECT
This greatly helps in broadening one¡¯s perspective and understanding various cultures. 
>> This greatly helps broaden one¡¯s perspective and understanding of various cultures.
For example, visiting historic cities in Europe or exploring traditional villages in Asia offers invaluable experiences that cannot be obtained through domestic travel.
>> CORRECT
Second, looking at the numerical trends in international travel, we can see a rise in the number of overseas tourists in recent years. 
>> CORRECT
According to the attached graph, there were frequent instances where the number of overseas tourists exceeded 2,600,000 during certain periods. 
>> According to the attached graph, there were frequent instances when the number of overseas tourists exceeded 2,600,000 during certain periods.
This indicates a growing demand for international travel.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141046 About the aging population ¼­*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-11-19 1039
141045 ESSAY: Nowadays, most countries improve their living standards... ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 4
141044 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1
141043 Are you excited about anything coming up in the near future? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1263
141042 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1341
141041 What do you think most people are worried about these days and... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1046
141040 Are there things/people at work that distract you so much that... ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1495
141039 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1084
141038 What cheers you up when you are sad? ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1314
141037 How is your father-in-law? Â÷*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1046
141036 Where do you think is the best place to live in South Korea... Â÷*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1186
141035 Homework ÀÌ*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1639
141034 Why do people get nervous in job interviews? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1358
141033 Do you have a favorite item in your collection? What is it, and... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1159
141032 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1277
141031 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1103
141030 What are the consequences of spending less time interacting... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1310
141029 I think there are more advantage than disadvantage. ÀÌ*Çü ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 2
141028 Music ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1183
141027 Page.51 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1341

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04