¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

It\'s a message that makes childhood is so tired.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Çü
2024-11-26 1103

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

People talk to chilldren "If you are so hard something, you can do anything". But I think It is not good message. This is because most people are good at something and bad at something. But I don't said that somthing I was bad at, I gave up quickly.
Sometimes we have to enjoy to do something and be satisfied to our results for examples speaking forign language, playing the piano, taking a exercise and so on. We can enjoy it for longer and grow by doing it.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thanks for doing your essay Ms. Ella! Well done! Your knowledge of the dispute and the events surrounding it shows in your essay. It is clear that you understand the main points of contention, and you have discussed these in an easily understood way. Keep it up!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
People talk to chilldren "If you are so hard something, you can do anything".
>>> People often tell children, "If you try hard enough, you can do anything."
But I think It is not good message. 
>>> I believe it's not always the best message.
This is because most people are good at something and bad at something.
>>>The truth is, everyone is good at some things and not so good at others.
But I don't said that somthing I was bad at, I gave up quickly.
>>> But it's important to note that just because we struggle with something doesn't mean we should give up quickly.
Sometimes we have to enjoy to do something and be satisfied to our results for examples speaking forign language, playing the piano, taking a exercise and so on. 
>>> Sometimes, it's more about enjoying the process and being satisfied with our progress, rather than just aiming for perfection. For example, learning a foreign language, playing the piano, or exercising
We can enjoy it for longer and grow by doing it.
>>> We can find joy in these activities, and by doing so, we can improve and grow over time.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141254 What is more exhausting: physical work or mental work? Àå*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 1
141253 Homework ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 2
141252 Homework ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 1279
141251 Describe your favorite restaurant or coffee shop where you hang... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 1430
141250 Locals in Taiwan ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 1031
141249 What are your thoughts on online shopping? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1159
141248 27Nov2024_homework ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1366
141247 When you were a child, what did you want to be when you grew up. Àå*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 0
141246 25nov2024_homework ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1260
141245 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1182
141244 What will you tell your future self? ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1164
141243 Do you have any friends from a different culture or country than... ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1366
141242 HOOMEWORK ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1246
141241 Homework ¾ç*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1253
141240 What¡¯s the most thoughtful gesture you¡¯ve received from a... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1167
141239 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1407
141238 Homework ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 5
141237 Write about your trip last week. Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1272
141236 What are your thoughts on your neighbors? Explain. Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1288
141235 Do you often greet strangers in public places like on the... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1792

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04