¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³ë*ö
2024-11-25 141

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q) Please write about the topic, "The Importance of Kindness as a Personality Trait.¡°

A) Kindness is important for everyone, even if we don't consider personality traits.
The question of how much kindness should be expressed is really difficult.
The other person may misunderstand because of too much kindness.
And if we continue to give the kindness to the other person, the other person may think of it as a right to be granted later.
This can happen especially when we express the kindness with money.
However, it would be better to show kindness in words to an introvert, and to an extrovert, it would be more necessary to show kindness in action.
However, this is only the basis of my judgment and not absolute.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi David! Your thoughts on kindness are truly meaningful, and I can see the care you¡¯ve put into expressing them. I made a couple of small corrections, but overall, your message was heartfelt and impactful. Keep sharing your beautiful ideas with the world; it makes a difference! 


~ Teacher Lia



Kindness is important for everyone, even if we don't consider personality traits.
>> CORRECT

The question of how much kindness should be expressed is really difficult.
>> CORRECT

The other person may misunderstand because of too much kindness.
>> CORRECT

And if we continue to give the kindness to the other person, the other person may think of it as a right to be granted later.
>> And if we continue to give kindness to the other person, they may think of it as a right to be granted later.

This can happen especially when we express the kindness with money.
>> This can happen especially when we express kindness with money.

However, it would be better to show kindness in words to an introvert, and to an extrovert, it would be more necessary to show kindness in action.
>> CORRECT

However, this is only the basis of my judgment and not absolute.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
139817 Homework : What is the most valuable item you\'ve ever spent... ÀÌ*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2024-09-10 739
139816 A recent activity that I enjoyed ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-09-10 1022
139815 Do you want to travel to outer space? Why, or why not? ÀÌ*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-10 876
139814 five years ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-10 1
139813 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-09-10 1
139812 The things I want to tell you ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-10 882
139811 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-09-10 796
139810 What¡¯s the most unusual drink you¡¯ve ever tried, and did you... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-09-10 920
139809 HOMEWORK FOR 09.09.2024 WRITING TASK: Were there any particular... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-09-10 4
139808 What is your favorite room in your house? Why? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-09-10 0
139807 What do you think is the easiest job in the world? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-09-10 0
139806 Have you ever been in a storm before? What did you do to stay... À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-09-10 0
139805 What do you think about children crying in a restaurant when you... À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-09-10 0
139804 Do you think it is more important to make a lot of money or to... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-10 846
139803 Hw Á¤*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-09-10 889
139802 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-09 0
139801 What was the last thing you did that made you feel so much... ÇÑ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-09 799
139800 HOMEWORK È«*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-09-09 1
139799 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-09-09 2
139798 Don\'t ask to her/his body size! ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2024-09-09 4

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04