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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
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One hand washes the other

작성자: 임*준
2024-11-24 87

회원님의 영작문

How does participating in an internship or co-op program help prepare students for their future careers?

>>> In my case, participating in an internship helps with me in two aspects. First aspect is about myself. Choosing my future work must be careful because that work can be my permanant job. We often speak that we should consider two things: Interest and aptitude. However we can't easily get a chance to experience our future work so our choice is getting much harder. Participating in an internship is critical solution to check those two things. Therefore it can be helpful for me in first aspect.
Second aspect is about employer. In my opinion, one of the most important consideration when picking job candidate is "Will this person easily adjusts to our circumstance and works for long period for us?" I'm sure that it will be never easy to choose proper person. However if there is a person who experienced internship, choice will be easier because it is a clue that this person can do

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Jun!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. You really did well! :)
~ T. Camille

How does participating in an internship or co-op program help prepare students for their future careers?

>>>  In my case, participating in an internship helps with me in two aspects. 
>> CORRECT!
First aspect is about myself. 
>> The first aspect is about myself. 
Choosing my future work must be careful because that work can be my permanant job. 
>> I must be careful in choosing my future work because that work can be my permanant job. 
We often speak that we should consider two things: Interest and aptitude. 
>> CORRECT!
However, we can't easily get a chance to experience our future work so our choice is getting much harder.
>> CORRECT!
Participating in an internship is a critical solution to check those two things. 
>> CORRECT!
Therefore it can be helpful for me in first aspect.
>> Therefore it can be helpful for me in the first aspect.
Second aspect is about employer. 
>> The second aspect is about the employer. 
In my opinion, one of the most important consideration when picking a job candidate is "Will this person easily adjusts to our circumstance and works for long period for us?"
>> In my opinion, one of the most important consideration when picking a job candidate is "Will this person easily adjust to our circumstance and work for long period for us?"
 I'm sure that it will be never easy to choose a proper person. 
>> CORRECT!
However, if there is a person who experienced internship, choice will be easier because it is a clue that this person can do
>> However, if there is a person who has experienced doing internship, choosing will be easier because it is a clue that this person can do many things.
OR >> >> However, if there is a person who has experienced doing internship, choosing will be easier because it is a clue what this person can do.
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