¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

There are no young people in rural areas.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Çü
2024-11-20 495

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Population have been reduced in my country. Married people don't want to have a chilldren. For example in Korea second big city Busan, these dayes calle 'The old man and the Sea' like classic novels. So Aging is social problem because It reduce worked people. I have seen there are no worked people in city outside. Then, import count increases and export count decreases. It is country economically serious probelm. Young people share social welfare spending but it is more and more heavy. Already, Youn people paid more money when take a subway. It needs socail discussion for future life.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day to you Ms. Ella!

I¡¯m truly impressed by your unwavering passion and dedication to completing your written assignments. Your commitment is inspiring! Keep honing your vocabulary skills—you¡¯re doing great, and I¡¯m excited to see how you continue to develop.

Best regards,
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
Population have been reduced in my country. 
>>> The population in my country has decreased.
Married people don't want to have a children. 
>>> Married couples no longer want to have children.
For example in Korea second big city Busan, these dayes calle 'The old man and the Sea' like classic novels. 
>>> For example, in Busan, Korea's second-largest city, it is often referred to as "The Old Man and the Sea," much like the classic novel.
So Aging is social problem because It reduce worked people.
>>> So, aging is a social problem because it reduces the number of people in the workforce.
 I have seen there are no worked people in city outside. 
>>> I have noticed that there are very few working people in the city during the day.
Then, import count increases and export count decreases. 
>>> As a result, imports increase while exports decrease.
It is country economically serious probelm.
>>> It is an economically serious problem for the country.
Young people share social welfare spending but it is more and more heavy. 
>>> Young people are bearing the burden of social welfare spending, but it is becoming increasingly heavy. 
Already, Youn people paid more money when take a subway. It needs socail discussion for future life.
>>> Already, young people are paying more when using the subway. This issue requires social discussion to ensure a sustainable future.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
139906 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 1411
139905 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 1079
139904 What challenges do people with disability face? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 1270
139903 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 3
139902 12.Sep.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 0
139901 Favorite god µµ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 1415
139900 Do you prefer a planned vacation or a spontaneous one? Why? ±è*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 1295
139899 Homework ³ë*ö ÁøÇàÁß 2024-09-13 1176
139898 HOMEWORK FOR 09.13.2024 WRITING TASK: What¡¯s the most annoying... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 3
139897 Which beverages do you think are the most popular in the world... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 1339
139896 Do you have any harmless bad habits? Do they annoy other people? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 2022
139895 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-09-13 1192
139894 Homework ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 3
139893 homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 1122
139892 The positive side of \"Are smartphones ruining our world?\" ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 1239
139891 How do you usually spend your Chuseok holiday? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 0
139890 home work ½Å*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 1241
139889 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 1188
139888 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 994
139887 What do you think is the most mysterious planet? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 1403

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04