¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Where do you think is the best place to live in South Korea nowadays?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Â÷*ȯ
2024-11-18 14

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Seoul is very nice place to live with family. There are a lot of fun sites to enjoy activities such as cycling across the city, walking in the beutiful street with trees, and even sports leisure in the Han-river. I recommend another small city nearby Seoul, Namyangju. My mother and sister lived there, because it is close to Seoul and not so expensive to live in the apartment. You can see a fantastatic landscape of North stream of Han-river in Namyangju. I really love the sunset of Han-river, so I hope to live there in the future (after my kids are growing up).

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Dr. David!

Seoul City has it all. From work places to recreation, medical and sports facilities among many others, it is the place to be. Yet, its crowded nature makes it difficult to live there quietly and pollution-free. Therefore, I agree that the suburbs are still the more livable areas devoid of noise and excessive traffic and pollution.

It seems like you like the serene sunset by the river. Thus, find that spot to live someday soon.

Below, I segmented your sentences so you can easily follow the grammar suggestions underlined in a few of your sentences. Take note of spellings, articles 'a' and 'the', and dictions to make your sentences even better. 

Thank you for this homework answer in spite of your super hectic schedule!

See you soon.

-T. Donna~

Seoul is very nice place to live with family. There are a lot of fun sites to enjoy activities such as cycling across the city, walking in the beutiful street with trees, and even sports leisure in the Han-river. 
>> Seoul is a very nice place to live with family. There are a lot of fun sites to enjoy activities such as cycling across the city, walking in the beautiful street with trees, and even sports leisure (in/ nearby) the Han-river.

I recommend another small city nearby Seoul, Namyangju. My mother and sister lived there, because it is close to Seoul and not so expensive to live in the apartment. 
>I recommend another small city nearby Seoul, Namyangju. My mother and sister live there, because it is close to Seoul and not so expensive to live in the apartment. Ver good sentences!

You can see a fantastatic landscape of North stream of Han-river in Namyangju. I really love the sunset of Han-river, so I hope to live there in the future (after my kids are growing up).
>> You can see a fantastic landscape of the northern stream of Han River in Namyangju. I really love the sunset of Han-river, so I hope to live there in the future (after my kids are grown up).
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
140846 I\'m terrible at negotiating when shopping :( ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-11-07 185
140845 Do Do you think the shape of your hands or fingers reveals... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-07 171
140844 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-11-07 172
140843 6.Nov.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-07 0
140842 What is the most beautiful city you have ever visited? ÀÌ*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2024-11-07 2
140841 What would a perfect day look like for you? ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 177
140840 What\'s the best company benefit or perk you\'ve received at... ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 173
140839 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 4
140838 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 169
140837 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 177
140836 Appearance important Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 3
140835 Should beauty standards include people of all shapes, sizes, and... ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 181
140834 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 178
140833 Introduce myself Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 185
140832 Cats and dogs are the most common types of pets. What are some... ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 185
140831 Some pieces of art sell for millions of dollars. Why are some... ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 194
140830 What was the hardest part about learning English? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 1
140829 How does kindness show up in small, everyday ways? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 187
140828 What do you want to include in your ideal fitness program? ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 196
140827 My hobby Á¶*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-06 194

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04