¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*´Ô
2024-11-06 119

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Our government gives a lot of benefits to the people.
Especially baby's moms and elderly have more it.
Elderly's Basic pension system have been introduced for 10 years.
70% of over 65 year old can get a pension from government.
And also government gives the jobs which is kind of picking some garbage.
So elderly can recieve 600 dollars everymonth.
My mom goes to free restaurant served by government for lunch.
Many benefits are following for them .
But many old people can't afford their hospital fee.
If their symptoms are seriously.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Ms. Sunny!
People who pay taxes are delighted when we see where our taxes are going. It should be given for the welfare of the citizen and not for the politician only.
Have a great day!
Aki~

Our government gives a lot of benefits to the people.
>>> CORRECT!

Especially baby's moms and elderly have more it.
>>> Especially for new moms and elderly people.

Elderly's Basic pension system have been introduced for 10 years.
>>> Elderly's basic pension system has been introduced for 10 years.

70% of over 65 year old can get a pension from government.
>>> 70% of those over 65 years old can get a pension from the government.

And also government gives the jobs which is kind of picking some garbage.
>>> And also the government gives easy jobs like picking up some garbage.

So elderly can recieve 600 dollars everymonth.
>>> So these elderly people can receive 600 dollars every month.

My mom goes to free restaurant served by government for lunch.
>>> My mom goes to a free restaurant served by the government for lunch.

Many benefits are following for them .
>>> CORRECT!

But many old people can't afford their hospital fee.
>>> But many old people can't afford their hospital fees.

If their symptoms are seriously.
>>>  If their symptoms are serious.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
139171 2024.08.14 ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 2
139170 homework ¹®*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 1
139169 What was your most memorable job interview experience? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 701
139168 How may we overcome laziness when dealing with an important... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 762
139167 Are parents who feed junk food to their children irresponsible? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 891
139166 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 815
139165 I think about food °í*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 591
139164 nap ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 0
139163 What is the best part of your childhood? ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 828
139162 Can you describe a piece of music that has a special meaning to... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 1019
139161 Favorite TV program? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 1
139160 How do you respect the privacy of all the members of your family? Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 622
139159 How do you handle situations when a problem occurs? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 610
139158 When was the last time you\'ve been working so hard? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 1
139157 How can you compare South Korean and English culture? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 0
139156 HOMEWORK FOR 08.14.2024 WRITING TASK: What are the drawbacks of... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 4
139155 Vegetarian ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 499
139154 How do you think having a household helper can impact family... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 793
139153 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 939
139152 How do you prioritize your physical health in your daily routine? ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-14 664

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04