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What’s the most memorable vacation you’ve had?

작성자: 배*빈
2024-11-03 256

회원님의 영작문

Traveling to Vietnam is the most memorable vacation for me.
And It is reason why I liked to travel to Vietnam.
First, I could relaxed.
I always busy to work in part time job in cafe and prepare English test for applying for the internship before I go to the travel. So, I could be stable and enjoy without any burden in Vietnam.
Second, It has many kind of activities.
I really like to experience various activities related to the country I travel to. For example, Wearing traditional clothes and eating famous food. So, I bought ‘ao dai’ that is vietnam’s traditional clothes and took them on while I was traveling. And I also made vietnam’s traditional foods in person. Therefore, I could learn more diversity culture and understood that through this experiences.
Finally, I liked to see sundown.
I though Vietnam have beautiful beaches. I and my friends walked along the beach for a long time and took so many photos. Sometimes when I looked the photos, I’m very happy and joyful.
So, I had a blas

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Yun Bin! I am glad to know that you had a great time in Vietnam. I hope you'll be able to travel more in the future. You were able to share your experiences using a lot of sentences. I commend you for that. Please take care, and see you!
--Teacher Anji

Traveling to Vietnam is the most memorable vacation for me.
>> CORRECT
And It is reason why I liked to travel to Vietnam.
>> These are the reasons I liked travelling to Vietnam.
First, I could relaxed.
>> First, I could relax.
I always busy to work in part time job in cafe and prepare English test for applying for the internship before I go to the travel. 
>> I'm always busy working at my part time job in a cafe, and preparing for English test for my application for internship before I went on a trip.
So, I could enjoy Vietnam without any stress. 
>> CORRECT
Second, It has many kind of activities.
>> Second, there are many kinds of activities. 
I really like to experience various activities related to the country I travel to. 
>> CORRECT
For example, Wearing traditional clothes and eating famous food. 
>> For example, wearing traditional clothes and eating famous food. 
So, I bought ‘ao dai’ that is vietnam’s traditional clothes and took them on while I was traveling. 
>> So, I bought an Ao Dai" Vietnam's traditional clothes, and took them on while I was traveling.
And I also made vietnam’s traditional foods in person.
>> I also made Vietnamese traditional food myself.
Therefore, I could learn more diversity culture and understood that through this experiences.
>>Therefor, I could learn more about diverse culture and understood them through these experiences. 
Finally, I liked to see sundown.
>> Finally, I liked seeing the sundown/sunset. 
I though Vietnam have beautiful beaches. 
>> I thought Vietnam had beautiful beaches. 
I and my friends walked along the beach for a long time and took so many photos. 
>> I and my friends walked along the beach for a long time, and took so many photos.
Sometimes when I looked the photos, I’m very happy and joyful.
>> Sometimes, when I looked at the photos, I'm very happy and joyful.
So, I had a blas.
>> So, I had a blast!

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