¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

I think South Korea isn\'t ready to accept the queer

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2024-10-22 2028

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Nowadays some Koreans understand queer easily. But I think South Korea isn't ready to accept the queer.

Recently the new Korean drama, which title is "Jeong-nyeon", is broadcast every weekend.
This drama is based on a popular webtoon of the same name, and tells the story of a Korean women's traditional opera in the 1950s.
There are many kinds of female characters in this drama, but queer character disappears in the drama.
This character was loved by fans of webtoon, so many fans get angry after drama is released.

Also, I told you that the trailer of drama version of "Love in the big city" disappear in the internet.
Because some civil group protested collectively, calling it obscene and glorifying homosexuality.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Min.

It's good to see you again here on the composition page.

Certainly, the concept of queer or the LGBTQ+ is not new to your country. The question is when they are going to be ready to start feeling comfortable about it. In my country, there are laws and policies for the queer. They are not a lot but we have lived with them peacefully overtime.

Since webtoon and Kdrama is one entertaining way of looking or mirroring our lives, some 'puritans' or conservatives may really feel uncomfortable about the idea of watching the queer mainstream. Until today, the issue of accepting queer in society is still polarizing.

Thank you very much for your composition.  I can see very good sentences as well as minute grammatical pointers you need to memorize. Overall, great job!

See you in class.

-T. Donna~

Nowadays some Koreans understand queer easily. But I think South Korea isn't ready to accept the queer.
>> Correct!

Recently the new Korean drama, which title is "Jeong-nyeon", is broadcast every weekend.
>> Correct!
Or: Recently the new Korean drama, which title is "Jeong-nyeon", is (aired/ shown) every weekend.

This drama is based on a popular webtoon of the same name, and tells the story of a Korean women's traditional opera in the 1950s.
>> Correct! Very good sentence!

There are many kinds of female characters in this drama, but queer character disappears in the drama.
>> Correct!

This character was loved by fans of webtoon, so many fans get angry after drama is released.
>> This character was loved by fans of webtoon, so many fans got angry after the drama was released.

Also, I told you that the trailer of drama version of "Love in the big city" disappear in the internet.
>> Also, I told you that the trailer of the drama version of "Love in the Big City" disappeared on the internet.

Because some civil group protested collectively, calling it obscene and glorifying homosexuality.
>> Correct! Very good sentence!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
140617 Increasing the minimum wage would reduce poverty. ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-10-25 1528
140616 When was the last time you felt proud of yourself? ±¸*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-25 1505
140615 Homework ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-25 1519
140614 homework ¾È*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-25 1571
140613 Homework ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-25 1373
140612 Konglish ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-25 1637
140611 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-10-25 1466
140610 Conversation with people of that country makes enrich their... ¼­*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-25 0
140609 homework ½Å*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-10-24 1378
140608 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-10-24 1280
140607 Some people say that humans are scarier than the most dangerous... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-24 1272
140606 Homework ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-24 2
140605 23oct2024 homework ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-10-24 1239
140604 There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples... ¹Ú*½Ä ¿Ï·á 2024-10-24 1302
140603 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-24 1
140602 Do you believe that if you help someone, something good will... ÇÑ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-24 1453
140601 What are the benefits of eating three eggs a day for you? ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-24 1404
140600 What would happen if we all woke up tomorrow and couldn¡¯t speak? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-24 1446
140599 does obtaining an award at school matter? ÃÖ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-24 1464
140598 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-24 1551

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04