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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Do you think abortion should be legal or illegal?

작성자: 이*윤
2024-10-16 421

회원님의 영작문

Oh, this topic is a profound and sensitive one. It is also a famous topic that is now hot all over the world. In the U.S., this topic also persuades voters.
Well, if abortion is legal, I think it should be illegal because there are more side effects from it.
People who want abortion to be legal say they want to have their own body's right to decide. Of course, it's also right to have your own body decision-making power.
However, if abortion is legal and implemented freely in the country, it has the potential to become a big business.
For example, there will build many institutions that perform abortions.
And indiscriminate sex can be prevalent among people without the importance of contraception. In particular, teenagers are more likely to be affected.
Therefore, I think abortion should be illegal for the importance and prudence of one's body.
However, I think some restrictive abortions should be allowed.
For example, unwanted pregnancies due to sex crimes allow for limited abortions.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Yun!~
Your compositions impressed me. In fact, the points I wished to emphasize were brought up. Continue to do well in your homework ^_^
Chammy
Oh, this topic is a profound and sensitive one. It is also a famous topic that is now hot all over the world. In the U.S., this topic also persuades voters.
OR
>>Indeed, this subject is delicate but relevant. It is also a well-known subject that is now trending globally. Voters in the United States are even influenced by this issue. 
Well, if abortion is legal, I think it should be illegal because there are more side effects from it. People who want abortion to be legal say they want to have their own body's right to decide.
OR
>>Since abortion has more negative impacts than positive ones, I believe it should be prohibited if it is permitted. Advocates of legalizing abortion claim that they want the freedom of choice to make their own decisions.
 Of course, it's also right to have your own body decision-making power.
>>  Of course, it's also right to have the authority to make your own decision.
However, if abortion is legal and implemented freely in the country, it has the potential to become a big business.
>> Correct
For example, there will build many institutions that perform abortions.
>> For example, there will be many institutions that perform abortions.
And indiscriminate sex can be prevalent among people without the importance of contraception. In particular, teenagers are more likely to be affected.
>> Correct
Therefore, I think abortion should be illegal for the importance and prudence of one's body.
>> Therefore, I think abortion should be illegal because of the importance and prudence of one's body.
However, I think some restrictive abortions should be allowed.
For example, unwanted pregnancies due to sex crimes allow for limited abortions.
>>Correct
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교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

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첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
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