¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Have you ever bought something without planning it, and then later wondered, ¡°Why did I buy this?¡±

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*Áø
2024-10-16 89

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

When I was a young living with my parent, I didn't have to worry about either making or saving money. At that time I was very careless enough that I bought so many things without planning at all. But this is one of my happiest memory ever.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Paul, 

Thank you for your homework.  It¡¯s great to hear that even though you bought things without planning, those moments have become some of your happiest memories. I believe many people can relate to that feeling. It¡¯s good that you can reflect on your experiences. In your future assignments, try to share more about how those purchases made you feel or what you learned from them. This will add more depth to your writing. Overall, you are doing well, and I encourage you to keep improving your writing skills. 

~Teacher Cathy 

 

 

When I was a young living with my parent, I didn't have to worry about either making or saving money.  

>>When I was young and lived with my parents, I didn't have to worry about making or saving money. 

At that time I was very careless enough that I bought so many things without planning at all.  

>>CORRECT 

OR>>Back then, I was so careless that I bought a lot of things without any planning. 

But this is one of my happiest memory ever. 

>>But this is one of my happiest memories ever. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
139030 Describe your childhood home. ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-08 534
139029 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 537
139028 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 3
139027 Which is better, television or books? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 0
139026 Are home-cooked meals the best? What¡¯s the best thing to do... ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 695
139025 How many people do you consider your \"best friends?\" ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 500
139024 Do you like salted, spicy, dry roasted or plain nuts? Do you... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 789
139023 homework day2 ¹Ú*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 1
139022 Rewarding yourself with treats ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 683
139021 8/5 homework ±è*½Â ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 5
139020 What are your expectations about London? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 1
139019 If you are not a teacher, what do you think your job is? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 1
139018 Q) How do you usually react when you lose? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 1
139017 What is your philosophy in life? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 484
139016 How to handle problems ÇÑ*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 7
139015 a plan ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 1
139014 Have you ever visited a place that exceeded your expectations?... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 544
139013 Healthy Diet Ways ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 344
139012 How is beauty defined in my culture. ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 523
139011 What are some popular spreads or toppings you like to put on... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-07 494

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04