¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Have you ever bought something without planning it, and then later wondered, ¡°Why did I buy this?¡±

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*Áø
2024-10-16 498

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

When I was a young living with my parent, I didn't have to worry about either making or saving money. At that time I was very careless enough that I bought so many things without planning at all. But this is one of my happiest memory ever.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Paul, 

Thank you for your homework.  It¡¯s great to hear that even though you bought things without planning, those moments have become some of your happiest memories. I believe many people can relate to that feeling. It¡¯s good that you can reflect on your experiences. In your future assignments, try to share more about how those purchases made you feel or what you learned from them. This will add more depth to your writing. Overall, you are doing well, and I encourage you to keep improving your writing skills. 

~Teacher Cathy 

 

 

When I was a young living with my parent, I didn't have to worry about either making or saving money.  

>>When I was young and lived with my parents, I didn't have to worry about making or saving money. 

At that time I was very careless enough that I bought so many things without planning at all.  

>>CORRECT 

OR>>Back then, I was so careless that I bought a lot of things without any planning. 

But this is one of my happiest memory ever. 

>>But this is one of my happiest memories ever. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141030 What are the consequences of spending less time interacting... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 175
141029 I think there are more advantage than disadvantage. ÀÌ*Çü ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 2
141028 Music ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 72
141027 Page.51 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 80
141026 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 1
141025 How do you feel about the idea of \\ Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 2
141024 Who is the healthiest person you know? What do they do to stay... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 184
141023 People get exercise while playing sports. Which sports are the... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 177
141022 How do you begin your day? Write about it. Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 85
141021 Do you think it\'s important to have a buddy? Why or why not? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 1
141020 Are you close to your neighbors? How do you get along with them? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 183
141019 People ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 90
141018 Dolphinsdoll ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 95
141017 When do you prefer having a family gathering? ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 91
141016 the bood and the movie ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 0
141015 To teacher ±è*¿ë ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 200
141014 Homework ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-16 117
141013 WRITING TASK ¼­*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-11-16 1
141012 HOOMEWORK ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-16 125
141011 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-15 240

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04