¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*¿ì
2024-10-15 235

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q: How can we reduce crime? With harsher punishments or better education?
A: I think both would be needed.
If people get a better education, then people would know the reason why they shouldn't commit crimes.
Still, there are some people who don't get enough education and they won't commit crimes if they know the punishments are harsher.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Paul!

Thank you for answering your homework.

~T. Divina^^

Here are some considerations:

1. I think both would be needed.
>>I think both are needed.

2. If people get a better education, then people would know the reason why they shouldn't commit crimes.
>>If people get better education, then they will know the reason why they shouldn't commit crimes.

3. Still, there are some people who don't get enough education and they won't commit crimes if they know the punishments are harsher.
>>Still, there are some people who don't get enough education but won't commit crimes once they know the punishments are harsher.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
139229 2024.08.15 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-08-16 894
139228 If you could have the perfect birthday party, what would it be? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-16 581
139227 What do you think of the sound and smell of rain? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-08-16 516
139226 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-16 458
139225 Agust 14th homework ¾È*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-16 382
139224 8/16(Fri) homework ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-16 667
139223 Have you ever worked in a place where you felt unhappy or... Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-08-16 634
139222 How to stop bullying in school. ÇÑ*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-16 6
139221 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-16 0
139220 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-16 0
139219 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-16 0
139218 What type of content would you suggest we produce to keep... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-08-16 701
139217 Holidays ±è*ÀÏ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-16 626
139216 HOMEWORK FOR 08.16.2024 WRITING TASK: What is the best place to... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-16 3
139215 How would you describe your previous job as a real estate agent? ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-16 603
139214 Page43 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-16 2
139213 Homework ¾È*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-16 7
139212 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-15 2
139211 What is the National Liberation Day of Korea about? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-15 732
139210 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-15 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04