¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

My homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2024-10-03 31

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

***********************
HOMEWORK FOR TODAY:
ESSAY: Some people believe the purpose of education is to prepare individuals to be beneficial to society. Others say the purpose of education is to achieve personal ambitions. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Education is good method for personal ambitions. It needs more information to success, and more information needs studing.
But on the other hand, it is good element of development beneficial to society.
There are all right answer, anybody don't say that other opinion are wrong. But, I think education is stronger society side.
If there is only personal ambition, many nations waste a lot of time and money.
The reason that they do compulsory education is that it helps the development of the country.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Lee~! ^^ Great job! Your essay clearly shows your understanding of the dispute and its key issues, and you explained everything in an easy-to-follow manner.

>>> TEACHER GEMMA

Education is good method for personal ambitions.

>>> Education is a valuable tool for achieving personal goals.

It needs more information to success, and more information needs studying.

>>> It requires knowledge to succeed, and to acquire knowledge, studying is necessary.  

But on the other hand, it is good element of development beneficial to society.

>>> On the other hand, education is a key factor in societal development and benefits everyone.
There are all right answer, anybody don't say that other opinion are wrong. 

>>> All opinions are valid; no one is saying that other viewpoints are wrong.

But, I think education is stronger society side.

>>> However, I believe education is a key strength for society.

If there is only personal ambition, many nations waste a lot of time and money.

>>> If people focus solely on personal ambition, many nations end up wasting time and money.

The reason that they do compulsory education is that it helps the development of the country.

>>> Compulsory education helps with the country's development. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
139680 Do you think holidays are important? Why? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-09-04 0
139679 The positive side of \"Is a college education worth it?\" ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 340
139678 homework ¹Ú*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 1
139677 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 380
139676 When should people avoid making promises? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 1
139675 Choose one popular fairy tale and change its ending. Explain why... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 0
139674 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 4
139673 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 355
139672 What things did you often trade when you were a child? Who did... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 441
139671 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 390
139670 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 1
139669 Are you generally a positive person or a negative person? ¹Ú*½Ä ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 354
139668 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 1
139667 Which part of your childhood do you wish you could change? Why? ÇÑ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 250
139666 If you could design your own park, what would you put in it? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 404
139665 Homwork ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 0
139664 homework ·ù*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 305
139663 What do you think about children crying in a restaurant when you... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 311
139662 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 207
139661 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04