무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Has social media made it easier to get famous? Is this good or bad?

작성자: 박*식
2024-10-03 583

회원님의 영작문

I agree with the statement that social media made it easier to get famous and there are positive effects. There are two reasons why I agree with this.

First of all, most of the people use social media so, there is an opportunity to become famous even if you're not a celebrity. To explain, the person who is famous on Youtube platform can be a famous if he can do amazing things. Such as magic and singing. For example, the singer, Benson Boone who is famous in TikTok, He became a famous star now a day.

Second, social media can make a global fan. Even if we are not a famous at first time, there are different diversity cultures in global field. There is an opportunity to become famous in global. However, it is important that this global exposure also comes with challenges. As individuals gain fame, they often face increased pressure from the public. The demands of maintaining a public spotlight can be overwhelming, and not everyone is prepared for the spotlight.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Mr. Hongshik! You have explained very good points on this topic. I particularly liked how you concluded your answer. Thanks for sharing!
-T. Sonny
I agree with the statement that social media made it easier to get famous and there are positive effects. 
>>I agree with the statement that social media has made it easier to get famous and there are positive effects. 
There are two reasons why I agree with this.
>>Correct!
First of all, most of the people use social media so, there is an opportunity to become famous even if you're not a celebrity. 
>>First of all, most people use social media so, there is an opportunity to become famous even if you're not a celebrity. 
To explain, the person who is famous on Youtube platform can be a famous if he can do amazing things.  Such as magic and singing. 
>>To explain, a person who is famous on the YouTube platform can be famous if he can do amazing things, such as magic and singing. 
For example, the singer, Benson Boone who is famous in TikTok, He became a famous star now a day.
>>For example, the singer, Benson Boone who is famous in TikTok, has become a famous star nowadays.
Second, social media can make a global fan. 
>>Second, social media can generate global fans. 
Even if we are not a famous at first time, there are different diversity cultures in global field. 
>>Even if we are not famous at first, there is diversity in cultures in the global field. 
There is an opportunity to become famous in global. 
>>There is an opportunity to become famous in globally. 
However, it is important that this global exposure also comes with challenges. 
>>However, it is important to know that this global exposure also comes with challenges. 
As individuals gain fame, they often face increased pressure from the public. 
>>Correct!
The demands of maintaining a public spotlight can be overwhelming, and not everyone is prepared for the spotlight.
>>The demands of maintaining a public spotlight can be overwhelming, and not everyone is prepared for it.


번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
141009 What would you say if you could talk to your future self? 신*규 완료 2024-11-15 137
141008 11/14(Thu) homework 김*희 완료 2024-11-15 205
141007 11/15(Fri) homework 김*희 완료 2024-11-15 212
141006 Home work for wednesday ( 13th Novemder ) 김*용 완료 2024-11-15 238
141005 >> Should people of all ages play games? Explain. 이*민 완료 2024-11-15 2
141004 What makes someone a good friend? 오*민 완료 2024-11-15 235
141003 Does age make you more aware of and caring for others? 이*윤 완료 2024-11-15 146
141002 What’s the best way to study for exams? 박*현 완료 2024-11-15 144
141001 HOOMEWORK 이*숙 완료 2024-11-15 229
141000 What do you think is the most difficult job in the world and why? 이*범 완료 2024-11-15 3
140999 What’s the most challenging part of your job? 이*범 완료 2024-11-15 2
140998 HOMEWORK FOR 11.15.2024 WRITING TASK: How can someone find his... 임*지 완료 2024-11-15 5
140997 HOMEWORK 양*영 완료 2024-11-15 151
140996 13nov2024-homework 김*라 완료 2024-11-15 168
140995 Do you like collecting books? 최*정 완료 2024-11-15 1
140994 Are pop stars good or bad influence on young people? 최*정 완료 2024-11-15 1
140993 If you could trade your entire collection for something else,... 임*미 완료 2024-11-15 145
140992 Ebs program 양*연 완료 2024-11-15 143
140991 Is it alright to borrow big money from friends? 김*희 완료 2024-11-14 259
140990 Homework 김*우 완료 2024-11-14 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]