무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Has social media made it easier to get famous? Is this good or bad?

작성자: 박*식
2024-10-03 532

회원님의 영작문

I agree with the statement that social media made it easier to get famous and there are positive effects. There are two reasons why I agree with this.

First of all, most of the people use social media so, there is an opportunity to become famous even if you're not a celebrity. To explain, the person who is famous on Youtube platform can be a famous if he can do amazing things. Such as magic and singing. For example, the singer, Benson Boone who is famous in TikTok, He became a famous star now a day.

Second, social media can make a global fan. Even if we are not a famous at first time, there are different diversity cultures in global field. There is an opportunity to become famous in global. However, it is important that this global exposure also comes with challenges. As individuals gain fame, they often face increased pressure from the public. The demands of maintaining a public spotlight can be overwhelming, and not everyone is prepared for the spotlight.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Mr. Hongshik! You have explained very good points on this topic. I particularly liked how you concluded your answer. Thanks for sharing!
-T. Sonny
I agree with the statement that social media made it easier to get famous and there are positive effects. 
>>I agree with the statement that social media has made it easier to get famous and there are positive effects. 
There are two reasons why I agree with this.
>>Correct!
First of all, most of the people use social media so, there is an opportunity to become famous even if you're not a celebrity. 
>>First of all, most people use social media so, there is an opportunity to become famous even if you're not a celebrity. 
To explain, the person who is famous on Youtube platform can be a famous if he can do amazing things.  Such as magic and singing. 
>>To explain, a person who is famous on the YouTube platform can be famous if he can do amazing things, such as magic and singing. 
For example, the singer, Benson Boone who is famous in TikTok, He became a famous star now a day.
>>For example, the singer, Benson Boone who is famous in TikTok, has become a famous star nowadays.
Second, social media can make a global fan. 
>>Second, social media can generate global fans. 
Even if we are not a famous at first time, there are different diversity cultures in global field. 
>>Even if we are not famous at first, there is diversity in cultures in the global field. 
There is an opportunity to become famous in global. 
>>There is an opportunity to become famous in globally. 
However, it is important that this global exposure also comes with challenges. 
>>However, it is important to know that this global exposure also comes with challenges. 
As individuals gain fame, they often face increased pressure from the public. 
>>Correct!
The demands of maintaining a public spotlight can be overwhelming, and not everyone is prepared for the spotlight.
>>The demands of maintaining a public spotlight can be overwhelming, and not everyone is prepared for it.


번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
140506 Homework 오*현 완료 2024-10-19 1
140505 What are the similarities/differences between collectors and... 김*린 완료 2024-10-19 362
140504 Do you think birth order makes a difference in your personality? 김*규 완료 2024-10-18 4
140503 Do you prefer to watch short or long videos online? What kinds... 오*민 완료 2024-10-18 372
140502 homework 김*현 완료 2024-10-18 340
140501 How would your life be different without access to technology? 박*은 완료 2024-10-18 364
140500 What song do you think has the best lyrics? Why do those lyrics... 박*은 완료 2024-10-18 466
140499 What\'s the most memorable adventure you\'ve had with friends? 박*은 완료 2024-10-18 367
140498 How do you think computers will change in the next 10 years? 박*은 완료 2024-10-18 362
140497 Do you think saving money is easier when you have a specific... 박*은 완료 2024-10-18 461
140496 Homework 류*우 완료 2024-10-18 400
140495 Do people need to be punished? Why? 이*윤 완료 2024-10-18 477
140494 English is very important to me! 최*연 완료 2024-10-18 463
140493 Many recent college graduates are un- or underemployed. What do... 안*윤 완료 2024-10-18 410
140492 16oct2024- homework 김*라 완료 2024-10-18 376
140491 What qualities does a person need to have to take care of old... 최*정 완료 2024-10-18 1
140490 Homework 김*우 완료 2024-10-17 1
140489 What occupations are most affected by weather? 진*호 완료 2024-10-17 3
140488 right to protect celebrities\' private lives. 박*경 완료 2024-10-17 467
140487 What do you and your classmates do during your lunch break? 오*민 완료 2024-10-17 377

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]