¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Why do you think people sometimes ignore or overlook others who are smaller or quiete?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*À±
2024-09-28 162

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Of course a lot of people feel power and dangerous for bigger or louder people. We feel less burden someone thin or short. We usually say "louder is winer" In Korea. But it's gonna be hurt if you ignore smaller of quiet people. Don't judge by it's cover.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hey, Ji Yun. Great job on sharing your thoughts on the homework topic. I hope the corrections I made will be very informative and useful. I wish you a great night and take it easy. Until the next class. ~ Jane :) 


Of course a lot of people feel power and dangerous for bigger or louder people. 
>> Of course, a lot of people feel powerless and in danger against bigger or louder people. 

We feel less burden someone thin or short. 
>> We feel bad for someone thin or short. 

We usually say "louder is winer" In Korea. 
>> We usually say "the louder one wins" in Korea. 

But it's gonna be hurt if you ignore smaller of quiet people. 
>> But it's hurtful if we ignore smaller or quiet people. 

Don't judge by it's cover. 
>> Don't judge a book by its cover. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
137300 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 0
137299 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 1
137298 homework 05.20 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 422
137297 Can you live without internet? ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 444
137296 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 1
137295 Homework È«*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 0
137294 What do you think makes a successful cabin crew team? õ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 570
137293 Do you think it\'s a good idea to write your goals down and tick... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 360
137292 2024-05-17 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 501
137291 Which of your goals have you already achieved? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 0
137290 would you like to read more? What do you get out of reading? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 520
137289 2024.05.20 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 526
137288 How do you show you care for old people? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 629
137287 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 400
137286 Homework 9 ¼Û*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 567
137285 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 1
137284 homework ±è*º° ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 2
137283 in the kitchen ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 1
137282 What place in your country will you never recommend to be... ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 3
137281 HOMEWORK FOR 05.17.2024 WRITING TASK: Who do you always keep... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-05-20 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04