¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Why do you think people sometimes ignore or overlook others who are smaller or quiete?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*À±
2024-09-28 800

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Of course a lot of people feel power and dangerous for bigger or louder people. We feel less burden someone thin or short. We usually say "louder is winer" In Korea. But it's gonna be hurt if you ignore smaller of quiet people. Don't judge by it's cover.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hey, Ji Yun. Great job on sharing your thoughts on the homework topic. I hope the corrections I made will be very informative and useful. I wish you a great night and take it easy. Until the next class. ~ Jane :) 


Of course a lot of people feel power and dangerous for bigger or louder people. 
>> Of course, a lot of people feel powerless and in danger against bigger or louder people. 

We feel less burden someone thin or short. 
>> We feel bad for someone thin or short. 

We usually say "louder is winer" In Korea. 
>> We usually say "the louder one wins" in Korea. 

But it's gonna be hurt if you ignore smaller of quiet people. 
>> But it's hurtful if we ignore smaller or quiet people. 

Don't judge by it's cover. 
>> Don't judge a book by its cover. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
139090 Do you buy souvenirs when you go on a trip abroad? Explain. Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-11 772
139089 Protect old building _ 2 ¾î*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-11 1
139088 Protecting old buidings ¾î*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-11 3
139087 homework day5 ¹Ú*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-10 2
139086 Describe a typical family unit and the importance of family in... ±è*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-08-10 796
139085 What would you like to do when you reach retirement age? ±è*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-08-10 745
139084 homework ¹®*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-10 24
139083 2024.08.09 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-08-10 725
139082 Do you think mobile telephones are dangerous in any way? ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-09 661
139081 Homework ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-09 1
139080 How do you handle problems when you encounter one? ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-08-09 675
139079 Many interesting ability of animals ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-09 689
139078 My thinking for running late of the meeting. ±è*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-09 5
139077 Personality ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-08-09 652
139076 Agust 7th homework ¾È*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-09 655
139075 Homwork ÀÌ*º° ¿Ï·á 2024-08-09 1
139074 2024.08.08 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-08-09 629
139073 2024.08.09 ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-08-09 1
139072 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-09 694
139071 What is your favorite water activity? Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-08-09 672

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04