¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

increasing retirement age.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¾ç*¿¬
2024-09-27 107

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I agree with increasing retirement age. The average life expectancy has been rising over the last several decades thanks to the development of medical industry. Nowadays we can see the people over sixty doing work in various fields. Our retirement age in Korea is supposed to increase gradually up to 65, which currently is 60.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Gi Yean!
Thank you for always making time to do your homework, no matter how busy you were. I agree! With the increase in life expectancy, many people are willing to work even after retirement, so extending the retirement age can help them continue to work and earn a fair salary.
- T. Caitlyn
I agree with increasing retirement age. 
>. CORRECT
The average life expectancy has been rising over the last several decades thanks to the development of medical industry.
>> The average life expectancy has been rising over the last several decades, thanks to the development of the medical industry.
 Nowadays we can see the people over sixty doing work in various fields. 
>> Nowadays, we can see people over sixty working in various fields.
Our retirement age in Korea is supposed to increase gradually up to 65, which currently is 60.
>> The retirement age in Korea is supposed to gradually increase to 65, which is currently 60.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
139869 Homework ³ë*ö ÁøÇàÁß 2024-09-12 424
139868 What¡¯s something interesting or unique about drinking culture... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 343
139867 Homework : How often do you clean your room? What do you usually... ÀÌ*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2024-09-12 661
139866 What chores are your responsibility? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-09-11 0
139865 Do you think you can teach someone to be successful? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-11 416
139864 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-11 1
139863 home work ½Å*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-09-11 660
139862 I like the conversation with the new person. ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2024-09-11 3
139861 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-09-11 2
139860 Describe a moment when you felt truly proud of yourself. What... ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-09-11 425
139859 Do you ever eat a midnight snack? What do you like to eat late... ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-09-11 367
139858 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-09-11 229
139857 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-11 569
139856 . À±*¹® ¿Ï·á 2024-09-11 2
139855 How do you usually spend your Chuseok holiday? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-11 4
139854 Q) When you were a child, what did you want to grow up to be? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-11 0
139853 9/11(Wed) homework ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-11 394
139852 Homework ³ë*ö ÁøÇàÁß 2024-09-11 660
139851 Homework^*^ ÃÖ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-11 338
139850 Sadness ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-09-11 372

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04