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Education system of korea

작성자: 박*경
2024-09-25 520

회원님의 영작문

I can say that the education system of korea is really advanced. Most students in korea go to the academy, and it is natural to learn a lot of things deeply and study until late night. And a large number of parents want their children to study hard for their future. Studying hard and Getting a high score in Korea are really demanding tasks. So, because of studying, there can be a severe trouble between parents and children.
Especially, In korea, many students choose to enter the university or college considering other countries' college entrance rates. Certification of graduation is needed(almost essential) when we try to get a job. The best way to get a well-paid job is certification of graduation from prestigious university.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Ms. Casey! I agree with you. Korea is known for its high standards for education and how you value education. Thank you for sharing!
-T. Sonny
 I can say that the education system of korea is really advanced. 
>> I can affirm that the education system of Korea is highly advanced. 
Most students in korea go to the academy, and it is natural to learn a lot of things deeply and study until late night. 
>>Most students in Korea go to academies, and it is normal to learn a lot of things passionately and study until late at night. 
And a large number of parents want their children to study hard for their future. 
>> The majority of parents want their children to study hard for their future. 
Studying hard and Getting a high score in Korea are really demanding tasks. 
>>Studying hard and getting high marks in Korea are truly demanding tasks. 
So, because of studying, there can be a severe trouble between parents and children.
>>So, because of studying, there can be serious conflicts between parents and children.
Especially, In korea, many students choose to enter the university or college considering other countries' college entrance rates. 
>>Most especially, in Korea, many students consider other countries' college entrance rates when choosing a university or college. 
Certification of graduation is needed(almost essential) when we try to get a job. 
>>Certification of graduation is needed and is almost essential when we try to get a job. 
The best way to get a well-paid job is certification of graduation from prestigious university.
>>The best way to get a well-paid job is to have a graduation diploma from a prestigious university.
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