¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If there are people that you do not want to come to your country, who are they and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2024-09-25 813

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I didn¡¯t think about people who don¡¯t want to come here but who can¡¯t come here due to political situations or visa problems because even Japanese enjoy visiting Korea and vice versa. If there could be some people who don¡¯t want to come to Korea, they might be people who take Korea for enemy or competitor whether politically or economically. Many years ago, we Koreans made protest against Japan¡¯s controversial and distorted perception of history between Korea and Japan. We couldn¡¯t stand looking at Japan¡¯s intentional distortion what happened to get political benefits such as Dokdo located between two countries. Only very few Koreans visited Japan, causing economical severe damage on Japan tourism industry which live on Korean tourists during the boycott. But this was brought about by Japanese right-leaning radical politicians not by normal Japanese. I hope that kind of conflicts and victims don't happen anymore.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Yeong!
Who wouldn't like to be visited by tourists, right? Tourism also promotes the development of one's economy. However, there are factors that we (citizens) are thinking that a certain country must not go into your country for safety and security purposes. Thank you for your answers.There were just those small errors that need to me modified in your sentence. 
Have a good day!
Aki~

I didn¡¯t think about people who don¡¯t want to come here but who can¡¯t come here due to political situations or visa problems because even Japanese enjoy visiting Korea and vice versa.
>>> I didn¡¯t think about people who don¡¯t want to come here but who can¡¯t come here due to political situations or visa problems because even the Japanese enjoy visiting Korea and vice versa.

If there could be some people who don¡¯t want to come to Korea, they might be people who take Korea for enemy or competitor whether politically or economically.
>>> If some people don¡¯t want to come to Korea, they might be people who take Korea as an enemy or competitor whether politically or economically.

Many years ago, we Koreans made protest against Japan¡¯s controversial and distorted perception of history between Korea and Japan.
>>> Many years ago, we Koreans protested against Japan¡¯s controversial and distorted perception of history between Korea and Japan.

We couldn¡¯t stand looking at Japan¡¯s intentional distortion what happened to get political benefits such as Dokdo located between two countries.
>>>  We couldn¡¯t stand looking at Japan¡¯s intentional distortion of what happened to get political benefits such as Dokdo located between two countries.

Only very few Koreans visited Japan, causing economical severe damage on Japan tourism industry which live on Korean tourists during the boycott
>>>  Only very few Koreans visited Japan, causing severe economic damage to Japan's tourism industry which lived on Korean tourists during the boycott.

 But this was brought about by Japanese right-leaning radical politicians not by normal Japanese. I hope that kind of conflicts and victims don't happen anymore.
>>>  But this was brought about by Japanese right-leaning radical politicians, not by normal Japanese. I hope that kind of conflict and victims don't happen anymore.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
139313 The positive side of peer pressure ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 1020
139312 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 773
139311 homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 2
139310 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 552
139309 Do you sometimes compete with your friends? In what way? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 964
139308 What are your usual food cravings? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 2
139307 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 619
139306 befriend ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 1
139305 Do you think students in Korea are given enough credit for their... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 0
139304 What is the most important item do you have? Why? ¾È*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 5
139303 What\'s your weakness? ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 12
139302 why Air Arabia? ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 10
139301 hobby ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 9
139300 What do you do? ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 9
139299 Writing task: Is it important to do some stretching in the... ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 752
139298 Writing task: Do you believe dreams have a special meaning? Why... ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 844
139297 Fake news ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 1017
139296 Writing task: What do you think are the disadvantages of getting... ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 854
139295 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 848
139294 success ÀÓ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 743

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04