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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

The positive side of \"Are smartphones ruining our world?\"

작성자: 손*희
2024-09-12 1660

회원님의 영작문

Hello, I'm Hana, and I'd like to present my opinion on the topic, "Are smartphones ruining our world?". I think smartphones are ruining our world. First, a literacy of people is decreasing by using smartphones. As you know, recent students like short-contents such Shorts of Reels. As students continue to watch short-form content on their smartphones, the amount of reading they do is decreasing. Therefore, students' literacy are also decreasing now. E-books exist as an alternative, but they are very bad for students' eye health.
Second, people's dependence on smartphones is worsening. It is also connected with smartphone addiction, but I want to argue that the need for smartphones has gone beyond the norm. Among the AI ​​systems installed in smartphones, those related to food, clothing, and shelter are helpful to human life. However, AI technologies that provide knowledge, such as ChatGPT, are being abused over time. For example, Some student copy what ChatGPT says and do their homework

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Hana! Thank you for these wonderful insights again. Let's discuss it more in the class. See you.
--Teacher Anji


Hello, I'm Hana, and I'd like to present my opinion on the topic, "Are smartphones ruining our world?".
>> CORRECT
I think smartphones are ruining our world. 
>> CORRECT
First, a literacy of people is decreasing by using smartphones.
>>  First, people's literary is decreasing due to the use of smartphones. 
As you know, recent students like short-contents such Shorts of Reels.
>> As you know, recent students prefer short content, such as Shorts or Reels.
As students continue to watch short-form content on their smartphones, the amount of reading they do is decreasing. 
>> CORRECT
Therefore, students' literacy are also decreasing now.
>> Therefore, students' literacy is also decreasing now.
E-books exist as an alternative, but they are very bad for students' eye health.
>> CORRECT
Second, people's dependence on smartphones is worsening. It is also connected with smartphone addiction, but I want to argue that the need for smartphones has gone beyond the norm. 
>> CORRECT
Among the AI technology systems installed in smartphones, those related to food, clothing, and shelter are helpful to human life. 
>> CORRECT
However, AI technologies that provide knowledge, such as ChatGPT, are being abused over time.
>> CORRECT
For example, Some student copy what ChatGPT says and do their homework.
>> For example, some students copy what ChatGPT says and do their homework.
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
140107 Homework 노*철 완료 2024-09-27 1646
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140105 What are the most common organizations in your country and what... 김*린 완료 2024-09-27 1348
140104 Homework 김*서 완료 2024-09-26 0
140103 Homework 오*현 완료 2024-09-26 2
140102 Should there be any zoos in the world? 손*희 완료 2024-09-26 1412
140101 Homework 김*우 완료 2024-09-26 2
140100 networks important for getting jobs 박*경 완료 2024-09-26 1495
140099 Homework 권*미 완료 2024-09-26 2
140098 Home work 신*라 완료 2024-09-26 1241
140097 Topic: Does your country have a good education system? 박*식 완료 2024-09-26 1470
140096 Homework 김*숙 완료 2024-09-26 1874
140095 How is a mistake different from an error? 김*진 완료 2024-09-26 1402
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140093 september.25 임*실 완료 2024-09-26 1521
140092 Would you rather drive your car or use public transportation?... 한*연 완료 2024-09-26 1607
140091 Homework 류*우 완료 2024-09-26 1645
140090 Homework 김*서 완료 2024-09-26 0
140089 What do you think is the smallest marine mammal? 박*현 완료 2024-09-26 1665
140088 Homework 권*미 완료 2024-09-26 0

HOW TO USE IT?

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