¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Second homework in this week

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*¿¬
2024-09-12 587

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I often frown between my eyebrows when I concentrate and study.
I try to relax my eyes and smile because it creates wrinkles between my eyebrows and looks like an angry person.
People who don't know me well sometimes mistake me for being in a bad mood when they see it. It may make people uncomfortable. However, it happens unconsciously and when I become conscious, I try to fix it.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Seo Yeon!
Thank you for submitting your composition! I hope you enjoy the long break ahead :) 
Chammy
I often frown between my eyebrows when I concentrate and study.
OR
>> When I am concentrating on my studies, I often scowl between my eyebrows.
I try to relax my eyes and smile because it creates wrinkles between my eyebrows and looks like an angry person.
OR
>>I try to relax my eyes and smile to avoid creating wrinkles between my eyebrows, which can make me appear angry.
People who don't know me well sometimes mistake me for being in a bad mood when they see it.
 It may make people uncomfortable. However, it happens unconsciously and when I become conscious, I try to fix it.
>>Correct
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138957 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-05 0
138956 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-05 0
138955 Children\'s using cell phone ÇÑ*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-05 4
138954 Organic food ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-05 735
138953 homework ¹®*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-05 3
138952 2024.08.02 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-08-05 751
138951 Do you enjoy making snacks at home, or do you prefer buying them... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-05 813
138950 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-08-05 563
138949 Describe your hometown ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-05 664
138948 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-04 0
138947 Homwork ½Å*Á¾ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-04 0
138946 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-04 0
138945 Military policies ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-08-04 666
138944 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-04 0
138943 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-04 3
138942 Why do you think it is so difficult for people to give up and... Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-04 0
138941 Has food ever made you sick? What happened? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-04 0
138940 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-04 0
138939 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-04 5
138938 8/5 essay ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-04 698

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04