¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

A Recent Experience of Apology

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2024-08-26 773

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I told you my last apology at the class. I want to tell you full story.

One day, my team members discussed how to work efficiently.
One of my colleague insisted that we need to reduce the process of work cooperating with other departments.
But others insisted that cooperation with other departments is too hard, because not all team members are cooperative with our team.
Each other's voices increased at that time, and I couldn't concentrate on my task.

So I said that "Why did you make a loud voice? I think we can work in our own way!", with temperamental voice.
Then our office became silent at that moment.

After calming myself down, I started to feel ashamed to speak temperamentally in the office.
And then I wanted to apologize to my colleague who would have felt bad in that situation.
So I apologized for hurting her feelings, and fortunately, my colleague accepted my apology.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there, Min!

Thank you for elaborating the story about why you apologized in your office. I believe that you have nothing to be sorry or apologize about as you were in the right thinking at the time. However, you are correct to apologize since you may have hurt a colleagues ego or feelings by shutting down her sentiments.

Sometimes, the loudest point is the calmest voice. There are so many people screaming for their points of view but people do not want to listen to them. Since we have all been civilized by education and culture, we know that there is no problem better solved by a democratic and an orderly way of dialogue especially in the professional world. I admire your calmness and leadership that moment.

Congratulations to a very clear and organized composition! As you can see, there were so many correct sentences. Continue writing to express your ideas using precise adjectives and verbs. Excellent composition!

See you in class.

-T. Donna~
 
I told you my last apology at the class. I want to tell you full story.
>> I told you my last apology in class. I want to tell you the full story.

One day, my team members discussed how to work efficiently.
>> Correct!

One of my colleague insisted that we need to reduce the process of work cooperating with other departments.
>> Correct!

But others insisted that cooperation with other departments is too hard, because not all team members are cooperative with our team.
>> Correct!

Each other's voices increased at that time, and I couldn't concentrate on my task.
>> Correct!
Or: Each other's voices were loud at that time, and I couldn't concentrate on my task.

So I said that "Why did you make a loud voice? I think we can work in our own way!", with temperamental voice.
>> So I said, "Why did you make your voice loud? I think we can work in our own way," with a temperamental voice.

Then our office became silent at that moment.
>> Correct!

After calming myself down, I started to feel ashamed to speak temperamentally in the office.
>> Correct!

And then I wanted to apologize to my colleague who would have felt bad in that situation.
>> Correct! Very good sentence!

So I apologized for hurting her feelings, and fortunately, my colleague accepted my apology.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
139578 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 0
139577 What is your opinion on the importance of learning a second... Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 772
139576 In some countries, parents often send their children abroad to... Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 1050
139575 The negative side of \" Should public libraries be allowed to... ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 552
139574 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 2
139573 HOMEWORK È«*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 675
139572 How can reading benefit you? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 0
139571 #1 Assignment ¹Ú*½Ä ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 701
139570 2024.08.29 ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 0
139569 Did you grow up with pets in your home? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 0
139568 What do you like the most about your family? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 787
139567 Would you rather have the perfect body or be super intelligent? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 0
139566 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 1
139565 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 943
139564 The things that would give a good first impression ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 978
139563 My feelings after apologizing ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 729
139562 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 630
139561 The best season ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 486
139560 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 700
139559 What is the importance of family? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-29 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04