¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

The positive side on \" Is drinking milk healthy for humans? \"

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼Õ*Èñ
2024-08-13 334

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I'm Hana, and I'd like to present my opinion on the topic, "Is drinking milk healthy for humans?" Do you like milk? Actually, milk is known for health and tasty drink to many people. However, there are many heated debates about drinking milk. I think drinking milk is healthy for humans.
First, milk is good for growth of human's height. Milk contains lots of calcium and calcium is also good nutrients for growth of bones. According to the , milk contains nearly all the basic nutrients that a growing child needs. Calcium is one of them.
Second, milk is good for relieving depression. Do you know milk contains not only basic nutrients but also vitamin D? According to public site of Korean hospital, Vitamin D helps relieving depression. If you drink milk, you can have some effect that relieve depression.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Hana! Thank you for the great opinion. As you have mentioned, as long as it is done in moderation, milk can be really healthy. The benefits outweigh the risks. Let us talk more again soon. See you!
--Teacher Anji


I'm Hana, and I'd like to present my opinion on the topic, "Is drinking milk healthy for humans?" 
I'm Hana, and I'd like to present my opinion on the topic, "Is drinking milk healthy for humans?"
Do you like milk?
CORRECT
Actually, milk is known for health and tasty drink to many people. 
Actually, milk is known as a healthy and tasty drink to many people.
However, there are many heated debates about drinking milk.
However, there are many heated debates about drinking milk.
 I think drinking milk is healthy for humans.
I believe drinking milk is healthy for humans.
First, milk is good for growth of human's height. 
First, milk is good for the growth of a person's height.
Milk contains lots of calcium and calcium is also good nutrients for growth of bones. 
Milk contains a lot of calcium, which is also an important nutrient for bone growth.
According to the , milk contains nearly all the basic nutrients that a growing child needs. Calcium is one of them.
According to research, milk contains nearly all the basic nutrients that a growing child needs, and calcium is one of them.
Second, milk is good for relieving depression.
Second, milk is good for relieving depression.
Do you know milk contains not only basic nutrients but also vitamin D?
Did you know that milk contains not only basic nutrients but also vitamin D?
According to public site of Korean hospital, Vitamin D helps relieving depression.
According to a public site of a Korean hospital, vitamin D helps relieve depression.
If you drink milk, you can have some effect that relieve depression.
If you drink milk, you may experience some relief from depression.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136958 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 202
136957 How do you avoid forgetting your plans? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 318
136956 Why I think peer pressure is harmful ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 552
136955 howework ÇÑ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 1
136954 howework ÇÑ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 0
136953 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 2
136952 What are some popular sweets in your culture? ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 324
136951 dialogue ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 1
136950 How do you feel when people say that you look good? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 267
136949 2024.05.03 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 209
136948 How\'s your work efficiency? Write the factors that affect your... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 2
136947 3.May.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 0
136946 What do you often do on Children\'s Day? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 1
136945 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-05 0
136944 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-05 0
136943 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-05 0
136942 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-05 1
136941 Which products would you like to sell if you had your own store? Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-05-05 253
136940 my favorite animal ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-05-05 235
136939 Have you ever experienced stiffness? If yes, how did you handle... ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-05 271

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04