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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Is there a particular artist or band that has influenced your life in a positive way?

작성자: 박*호
2024-08-13 591

회원님의 영작문

I have experienced how the arts, such as songs, movies, and plays, play a big role in social change.
I came to Seoul for the first time after leaving my rural hometown in 1986 when I entered college.
At that time, Korea's citizens' democratization movement against the dictatorship was in full swing.
College students like me also left their studies behind and joined the protesters every day to participate in the democracy movement.
At that time, there was a singing group that sang protest songs at the protest site to liven up the atmosphere.
We called them ‘People Seeking Songs’.
They were not a specific band, but a union of singing circles from various universities in Seoul.
In conclusion, their role greatly contributed to Korea's successful democratization in the mid-1980s and significant economic development.
This morning, while doing my writing homework, I listened to the song again and reminisced.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Happy Tuesday, Sun! 

The importance of music goes beyond recalling memories and mood regulation. Music can also be a therapeutic tool for stress relief, healing, and emotional processing. In fact, some therapists use music therapy to manage conditions like anxiety, dementia, and substance use disorders, improving patients' quality of life.

- Kristine ^^ 

I have experienced how the arts, such as songs, movies, and plays, play a big role in social change.
>> Correct. 
I came to Seoul for the first time after leaving my rural hometown in 1986 when I entered college.
>> Correct. 
Or >> In 1986, when I started college, I left my small town and went to Seoul for the first time.
At that time, Korea's citizens' democratization movement against the dictatorship was in full swing.
>> Correct. 
College students like me also left their studies behind and joined the protesters every day to participate in the democracy movement.
>> Students in college, like me, abandoned their studies to join the demonstrators daily in support of the democratic cause.
At that time, there was a singing group that sang protest songs at the protest site to liven up the atmosphere.
>> To lighten the mood at the protest location at the time, a singing group was performing protest songs.
We called them ‘People Seeking Songs’.
>> Correct. 
They were not a specific band, but a union of singing circles from various universities in Seoul.
>> Correct. 
In conclusion, their role greatly contributed to Korea's successful democratization in the mid-1980s and significant economic development.
>> Correct. 
This morning, while doing my writing homework, I listened to the song again and reminisced.
>> I listened to the song again this morning and thought back on the past while working on my writing assignment.
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지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
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문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

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