¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Final remarks of \" Should homework be banned?\"

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼Õ*Èñ
2024-08-01 132

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I'm Hana presenting my final remarks of "Should homework be banned?". If you are students, you may have homework. I'm going to talk about its presence.
First, It brings families closer together. If there is proper mediation between parents and children, homeworks become necessary. For example, if I promise to do my math homework 2 pages, my mom can give me some snacks.
Second, Homework is necessary because it can help a student take responsibility. As you know, responsibility is very important component in society. In teen, we should grow it by doing homework because we are a preparatory members in society.
In conclusion, I end my remarks to present my opinion to use some reliable examples and reasons. Thank you for reading.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë


HI, Hana! Congratualtions for the job well done! You were able to sum up your opinions about homework. I am glad to know that students like you are still  interested in doing homework. Please keep it up. See you!
--Teacher Anji


I'm Hana presenting my final remarks of "Should homework be banned?".
>>
I'm Hana, presenting my final remarks on "Should Homework Be Banned?".
If you are students, you may have homework.
 >> CORRECT
 I'm going to talk about its presence.
 >>I'm going to talk about its significance.
First, It brings families closer together.
>>First, homework brings families closer together.
 If there is proper mediation between parents and children, homeworks become necessary.
>> If there is proper mediation between parents and children, homework becomes necessary.
 For example, if I promise to do my math homework 2 pages, my mom can give me some snacks.
>> For example, if I promise to do two pages of my math homework, my mom can give me some snacks.
Second, Homework is necessary because it can help a student take responsibility.
>>Second, homework is necessary because it helps students take responsibility.
As you know, responsibility is very important component in society.
>>As you know, responsibility is a very important component of society.
In teen, we should grow it by doing homework because we are a preparatory members in society.
>> As teenagers, we should develop it by doing homework because we are preparatory members of society.
In conclusion, I end my remarks to present my opinion to use some reliable examples and reasons. Thank you for reading.
>>In conclusion, I end my remarks by presenting my opinion, supported by reliable examples and reasons. Thank you for reading.



 


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
139006 Jeju ÃÖ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 215
139005 Things that I would never do to my friend. ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 160
139004 What do Korean students usually do during their summer school... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 162
139003 8/7 writing task ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 5
139002 Describe your kindergarten graduation what did you wear and how... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 177
139001 What do you think is the most fun thing to do in the world?... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 148
139000 What\'s the most fun water activity for you? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 137
138999 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 0
138998 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 0
138997 [HW] What role do your interests play in your social... °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 164
138996 Is obesity a disease? ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 159
138995 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 158
138994 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 4
138993 Would you like to be a model? What do you think a model¡¯s life... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 131
138992 Is anger ever a bad thing? If so, when? Why? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 3
138991 Aside from financial reasons, why do we need to have a job? Àå*±¸ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 163
138990 Writing task: Are tattoos common and acceptable in Korea? Why or... ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 151
138989 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 152
138988 Publishing names ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 153
138987 Cutting down on caffeine. ÇÑ*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 6

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04