¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Final remarks of \" Books are better than television

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼Õ*Èñ
2024-07-23 208

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I'm Hana presenting final remarks of "Books are better than television". I'm pleasant to present my own opinion.
First, why I think about that is on lots of example of genius who read vast books. He is Thomas Edison. I'm sure that you know about him. According to the Korea Educational Government Sites, Edison could become brilliant invention master by reading books. As you can see, if you read a lot of books, you can be great man like him.
Second, we can avoid to be a couch potato. By thesis, < A study on Styles and Determinants of Parental Televison Mediation in Korea> found that Children's television consumption and home learning were also found to be significant. Because growth of children is sensitive and important, it's necessary for children not to contact harmful things and it will be helpful to avoid a couch potato.
In conclusion, I finish my final remarks to present my opinion to use some reliable examples and thesis. Thank you for reading.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Hannah! This is such a great piece! I like that you provided specific examples and studies to back your opinion. I agree that reading books help the development of children, but so does technology. Let us just be aware or the negative effects of such. Let us talk more again soon. See you!
--Teacher Anji



I'm Hana presenting final remarks of "Books are better than television". 
>> I'm Hana presenting my final remarks of "Books are better than television".
I'm pleasant to present my own opinion.
>> It's my pleasure to present my own opinion.
First, why I think about that is on lots of example of genius who read vast books. 
>> The first reason why I think about that are the geniuses who read vast variety of books.
He is Thomas Edison. 
>> CORRECT
I'm sure that you know about him. 
>> CORRECT
According to the Korea Educational Government Sites, Edison could become brilliant invention master by reading books.
>> According to the Korean Educational Government Sites, Edison was able to become a brilliant invention master by reading books.
As you can see, if you read a lot of books, you can be great man like him.
>>  As you can see, if you read a lot of books, you can be a great man like him.
Second, we can avoid to be a couch potato. 
>> Second, we can avoid  becoming a couch potato. 
By thesis,  A study on Styles and Determinants of Parental Televison Mediation in Korea, found that Children's television consumption and home learning were also found to be significant. 
>> A thesis entitled A study on Styles and Determinants of Parental Television Mediation in Korea, found that children's television consumption and home learning were  found to be significant.
Because growth of children is sensitive and important, it's necessary for children not to contact harmful things and it will be helpful to avoid a couch potato.
>> Because the growth of children is sensitive and important, it's necessary for children not to make contact with harmful things and it will be helpful to avoid being a couch potato.
In conclusion, I finish my final remarks to present my opinion to use some reliable examples and thesis. Thank you for reading.
>> In conclusion, I end my remarks to present my opinion to use some reliable examples and thesis. Thank you for reading.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138996 Is obesity a disease? ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 197
138995 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 196
138994 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 4
138993 Would you like to be a model? What do you think a model¡¯s life... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 170
138992 Is anger ever a bad thing? If so, when? Why? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 3
138991 Aside from financial reasons, why do we need to have a job? Àå*±¸ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 202
138990 Writing task: Are tattoos common and acceptable in Korea? Why or... ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 165
138989 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 192
138988 Publishing names ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 193
138987 Cutting down on caffeine. ÇÑ*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 6
138986 Aside from financial reasons, why do we need to have a job? Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 193
138985 Would you like to go travelling for a few years non-stop? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 190
138984 Q) Should junk food be banned in schools? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 2
138983 Homework : 8/6 Á¶*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 0
138982 Should be banned in school °­*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 194
138981 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 0
138980 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 0
138979 homework day1 ¹Ú*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 3
138978 Parental Agreement Marriage ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 0
138977 bachelor ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-06 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04