¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Final remarks of \" Books are better than television

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼Õ*Èñ
2024-07-23 322

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I'm Hana presenting final remarks of "Books are better than television". I'm pleasant to present my own opinion.
First, why I think about that is on lots of example of genius who read vast books. He is Thomas Edison. I'm sure that you know about him. According to the Korea Educational Government Sites, Edison could become brilliant invention master by reading books. As you can see, if you read a lot of books, you can be great man like him.
Second, we can avoid to be a couch potato. By thesis, < A study on Styles and Determinants of Parental Televison Mediation in Korea> found that Children's television consumption and home learning were also found to be significant. Because growth of children is sensitive and important, it's necessary for children not to contact harmful things and it will be helpful to avoid a couch potato.
In conclusion, I finish my final remarks to present my opinion to use some reliable examples and thesis. Thank you for reading.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Hannah! This is such a great piece! I like that you provided specific examples and studies to back your opinion. I agree that reading books help the development of children, but so does technology. Let us just be aware or the negative effects of such. Let us talk more again soon. See you!
--Teacher Anji



I'm Hana presenting final remarks of "Books are better than television". 
>> I'm Hana presenting my final remarks of "Books are better than television".
I'm pleasant to present my own opinion.
>> It's my pleasure to present my own opinion.
First, why I think about that is on lots of example of genius who read vast books. 
>> The first reason why I think about that are the geniuses who read vast variety of books.
He is Thomas Edison. 
>> CORRECT
I'm sure that you know about him. 
>> CORRECT
According to the Korea Educational Government Sites, Edison could become brilliant invention master by reading books.
>> According to the Korean Educational Government Sites, Edison was able to become a brilliant invention master by reading books.
As you can see, if you read a lot of books, you can be great man like him.
>>  As you can see, if you read a lot of books, you can be a great man like him.
Second, we can avoid to be a couch potato. 
>> Second, we can avoid  becoming a couch potato. 
By thesis,  A study on Styles and Determinants of Parental Televison Mediation in Korea, found that Children's television consumption and home learning were also found to be significant. 
>> A thesis entitled A study on Styles and Determinants of Parental Television Mediation in Korea, found that children's television consumption and home learning were  found to be significant.
Because growth of children is sensitive and important, it's necessary for children not to contact harmful things and it will be helpful to avoid a couch potato.
>> Because the growth of children is sensitive and important, it's necessary for children not to make contact with harmful things and it will be helpful to avoid being a couch potato.
In conclusion, I finish my final remarks to present my opinion to use some reliable examples and thesis. Thank you for reading.
>> In conclusion, I end my remarks to present my opinion to use some reliable examples and thesis. Thank you for reading.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
137423 HOMEWORK ÁÖ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-05-26 151
137422 What is more important when it comes to clothing, comfort or... Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-05-25 210
137421 Are men better drivers than women? Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-05-25 161
137420 Do you need an alarm clock to wake up? ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-05-25 317
137419 Writing Task: What helps you get to sleep? ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-05-25 154
137418 The way to veteran ÀÓ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-25 258
137417 Why is honesty important? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-05-24 149
137416 homework 05.24 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-05-24 264
137415 Protecting the natural environment ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-05-24 249
137414 What is the most popular mobile game in your country? ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-05-24 294
137413 Why do our dreams change as we grow older? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-24 237
137412 What are you passionate about? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-24 283
137411 How do you show respect to your teacher? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-05-24 226
137410 daughter-in-law ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-24 2
137409 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-24 180
137408 5/24(Fri) Homework ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-24 241
137407 In general, what is the quality of customer service in Japan? ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-24 0
137406 The assemble of art teachers °í*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-24 196
137405 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-05-24 186
137404 Myhomework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-05-24 300

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04