¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Is better education the solution to increasing crime rate or more serious punishment? - simi

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2024-07-23 242

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I want to make a limit line. When someone crime, society can give them two times. At that time, they can have a educate. (But heavy criminal or kill will not have a chance.)
Ordinary people can make miss. we can give them two times. Not more than three times. Under two times, punishment will be light. However, if they over the line, educating for them is not necessary. they need hurricane punishment.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Mr. Sammy! Personally, I think these could all be applicable to countries with a good judicial system. Also, I'm curious about the 'hurricane punishment'. Hope you could t ell me further about it. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
-T. Sonny
I want to make a limit line. 
>>I want to set a limitation.
When someone crime, society can give them two times. 
>>When someone commits a crime, the court would give them two chances.
At that time, they can have a educate. 
>>For that period, they would be educated.
(But heavy criminal or kill will not have a chance.)
>>(But for severe crimes or murder will not have a chance.)
Ordinary people can make miss. 
>>Ordinary people could fail.
we can give them two times. 
>>They would be given two chances.
Not more than three times. 
>>Not more than thrice.
Under two times, punishment will be light. 
>>If done less than twice, the punishment would be light.
However, if they over the line, educating for them is not necessary. 
>>However, if they exceed the limitation, education would not be necessary for them.
they need hurricane punishment.
>>What they need is a punishment as severe as a hurricane.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
139289 What are acceptable reasons for missing an appointment? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 178
139288 Q) What do you think is the best thing about being a mother? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 1
139287 Medical emergency ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 210
139286 If all jobs had the same pay, which one would you choose to do? ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-20 192
139285 Why do some people have more difficulty than others when... ¸Í*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-19 204
139284 What do you think of the sound and smell of rain? ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-19 181
139283 What do you usually carry with you? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-08-19 2
139282 No ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-08-19 200
139281 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-19 3
139280 About korean band ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-19 234
139279 How does social media influence the way people communicate with... ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-08-19 221
139278 howework ÇÑ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-19 1
139277 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-19 198
139276 8/20 writing task ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-19 3
139275 19.Aug.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-19 1
139274 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-19 1
139273 What was the most interesting place you have ever visited? ¸Í*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-19 201
139272 What was the last thing you did that made you feel so much... ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-08-19 446
139271 Do you prefer restaurants that are cheap and cheerful or very... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-08-19 223
139270 What¡¯s the best piece of advice your mother gave you? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-19 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04