¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½É*Áø
2024-07-18 652

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Korean companies are similar to military life. If you're unlucky, your boss always give you hard work. You have to obey them.
And if you're not satisfied with it, you're in big trouble. they don't respect younger people opinion. and you should work very low salary
The employment rate is getting higher these days. What's interesting is that more and more people are quitting. because many people feel hard to adjust in their work .You shouldn't force the younger generation to do everything for the company all the time. I hate it, bosses should always think Employees' leisure and health.but they only think company profit

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello again, Mi Jin!

I'm sending you back your revised composition from yesterday's homework. I apprecaite your sending it. Please go over the corrections and alternative expressions provided. Enjoy the rest of your evening! 

Cheers,
Jean~~



                                      What are your thoughts on the Korean work culture?



Korean companies are similar to military life. 
>> CORRECT~~

If you're unlucky, your boss always give you hard work. You have to obey them.
>> If you're unlucky, your boss always gives you a difficult job and you have to obey his/her orders or demands.

And if you're not satisfied with it, you're in big trouble. 
>> And if the boss isn't satisfied with your work, you're in big trouble. 

they don't respect younger people opinion. and you should work very low salary
>> They don't respect younger people's opinions and the salary is very low. 

The employment rate is getting higher these days. What's interesting is that more and more people are quitting. because many people feel hard to adjust in their work .
>> The employment rate is getting higher these days but what's interesting is that more and more people are quitting their jobs because many of them find it hard to adjust to their work.

You shouldn't force the younger generation to do everything for the company all the time. 
>> The younger generation shouldn't be forced to do everything for the company all the time.

I hate it, bosses should always think Employees' leisure and health.but they only think company profit
>> I hate bosses who put company profit over employees' leisure and health. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138005 What are some similarities and differences between your... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 908
138004 Pronouncing vowels ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 900
138003 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 912
138002 Traveling with my husband ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 765
138001 Public Transportation Crisis; Bus and Tube ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 1176
138000 How to rent in UK; Viewing and Referencing ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 960
137999 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 881
137998 My dream of the future °í*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 1011
137997 Although parents are responsible for raising a child, outside... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 1134
137996 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 1
137995 How do you encourage others to follow good habits or practices? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 656
137994 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 686
137993 HOMEWORK ÁÖ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 767
137992 If I could celebrate my birthday the way I wanted ÇÑ*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 685
137991 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 1
137990 Do you enjoy meeting new people? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 726
137989 Have you ever had a bad experience with ice cream? ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 707
137988 Could you live without your smartphone (or other technology... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 683
137987 HOMEWORK Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 608
137986 2024.06.21 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04