¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think it is more important to make a lot of money or to enjoy your job?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*ȯ
2024-07-14 203

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think that enjoying job is more important than making a lot of money. When I was a child, I learned how to successed. It was that, Today's pain will be tomorrow's glory. It means that I should invest in today for tomorrow, never enjoy today, and make a goal for my furture. If I achieve the goal, I am a success person. However, my life continues even after I achieve the goal. My teacher didn't tell me about life after achieving the goal. I think that now is most important in my life. Living while enjoying my current job is most important in my life.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Hwanny! I can see that you put a lot of effort into your work, and it shows! Please focus more on correct verb tenses and sentence structure. Spend a little extra time each day practicing the areas where you had difficulties.

- Teacher Angela



I think that enjoying job is more important than making a lot of money. 
>> I believe that enjoying your job is more important than earning a lot of money.

When I was a child, I learned how to successed. 
>> When I was a child, I learned how to succeed.

It was that, Today's pain will be tomorrow's glory. 
>> It was said that today's pain will be tomorrow's glory.

It means that I should invest in today for tomorrow, never enjoy today, and make a goal for my furture. 
>> It means that I should invest in today for tomorrow, not just enjoy today, and set goals for my future.

If I achieve the goal, I am a success person. 
>> If I achieve the goal, I am a successful person.

However, my life continues even after I achieve the goal. 
>> CORRECT

My teacher didn't tell me about life after achieving the goal. 
>> CORRECT

I think that now is most important in my life. 
>> I think that the present moment is the most important in my life.

Living while enjoying my current job is most important in my life.
>> The most important thing in my life is living while enjoying my current job.










¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138245 How do you feel when you think you are not prepared for something ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 1
138244 What is the most challenging part of your job? ¼Û*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 277
138243 Can horror stories also have themes or messages beyond just... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 242
138242 1.July.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 0
138241 2.July.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 0
138240 the atmosphere of a coffee shop ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 241
138239 The way to relieve my stress ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 237
138238 Page.3 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 2
138237 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-02 1
138236 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-02 1
138235 What are the best ways to avoid getting sick? Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-07-02 244
138234 The illusion of graduation ÀÓ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-02 234
138233 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-07-02 4
138232 washing one\'s face ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-07-02 334
138231 Homework À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-02 3
138230 If you could create a new toy, what would it be and why? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-02 270
138229 What is the best thing about the month of July? Write at least... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-07-02 285
138228 2024.07.01 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-07-02 187
138227 What is your favorite sandwich? What kinds of bread from other... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-07-02 300
138226 Do you usually try free samples at grocery stores? Why or why... ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2024-07-02 387

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04