¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½É*Áø
2024-07-11 1004

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Due to global warming, Korea changed from four seasons to two.
In addition, in summer getting hotter than before. So It's so humid that as soon as I hang the laundry. it dries fast speed.
plus i can find mold or many kind of bugs every where in my house I kept watching it
I can feel how sweet cold of winter is.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello again, Mi Jin!

I'm sending you back your revised composition. I apprecaite your sending it. Please go over the corrections and alternative expressions provided. Speak to you again tomorrow! Have a good evening! 


Cheers,
Jean~~



                       

John Steinbeck asked, "What good is the warmth of summer, without the cold of winter to give it sweetness." Do we need winter so that we appreciate summer?


Due to global warming, Korea changed from four seasons to two.
>> Due to global warming, Korea has changed from having four seasons to two.

In addition, in summer getting hotter than before. 
>> In addition, summer is getting hotter than before. 

So It's so humid that as soon as I hang the laundry. 
>> It's so humid that I can feel the humidity as soon as I hang the laundry. 

it dries fast speed.
>> So it dries fast. 

plus i can find mold or many kind of bugs every where in my house I kept watching it
>>  Plus, I can find molds or many kinds of bugs everywhere in my house. 

I can feel how sweet cold of winter is.
>> NOTE: My apologies but I don't know what this means. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
135076 How could art be appreciated and enjoyed by more people? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 1435
135075 one day, I give some money for the poor. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 1816
135074 What makes your job as a novelist fun? Çö*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 0
135073 homework ÇÑ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 1
135072 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 1131
135071 Discuss the pros and cons of using public transportation versus... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 2137
135070 Think about a time when you helped someone. Describe the... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 1659
135069 Describe a piece of technology you find useful in your daily... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 1191
135068 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 1598
135067 Discuss your daily routine, including diet, exercise, and... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 1615
135066 Business expense request ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 2
135065 👍🏻 Ȳ*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 1411
135064 a stomach ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 1
135063 Why do you need a moblie phone? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 1385
135062 I going to talk about the famous places in korea °í*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 1567
135061 What exotic food would you like to try? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 1466
135060 Spend six months in Canada ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 1467
135059 What is the best gift you have ever given to a friend? Why was... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 1556
135058 >> Give an example of a superstitious belief in Korea and... ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 2
135057 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-02-28 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04