¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½É*Áø
2024-07-11 499

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Due to global warming, Korea changed from four seasons to two.
In addition, in summer getting hotter than before. So It's so humid that as soon as I hang the laundry. it dries fast speed.
plus i can find mold or many kind of bugs every where in my house I kept watching it
I can feel how sweet cold of winter is.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello again, Mi Jin!

I'm sending you back your revised composition. I apprecaite your sending it. Please go over the corrections and alternative expressions provided. Speak to you again tomorrow! Have a good evening! 


Cheers,
Jean~~



                       

John Steinbeck asked, "What good is the warmth of summer, without the cold of winter to give it sweetness." Do we need winter so that we appreciate summer?


Due to global warming, Korea changed from four seasons to two.
>> Due to global warming, Korea has changed from having four seasons to two.

In addition, in summer getting hotter than before. 
>> In addition, summer is getting hotter than before. 

So It's so humid that as soon as I hang the laundry. 
>> It's so humid that I can feel the humidity as soon as I hang the laundry. 

it dries fast speed.
>> So it dries fast. 

plus i can find mold or many kind of bugs every where in my house I kept watching it
>>  Plus, I can find molds or many kinds of bugs everywhere in my house. 

I can feel how sweet cold of winter is.
>> NOTE: My apologies but I don't know what this means. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
133580 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 352
133579 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 85
133578 homework 01.02 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 236
133577 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 0
133576 How do you deal with people who seem to be detached at first? ÇÏ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 1
133575 Write about how you celebrated New Year such as the light... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 1
133574 Have you ever assisted anyone on behalf of a friend? ÇÏ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 1
133573 What are your favorite kinds of pasta? Describe them. Àü*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 6
133572 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 255
133571 we each go to play separately, such as meeting friends or going... À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 1093
133570 I don\'t want to change it. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 720
133569 I\'m watching Netflix while eating tangerines while lying on the... À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 186
133568 What are your goals for the New Year? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 1
133567 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Would you like... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 1
133566 What are your New Year\'s resolutions? Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 414
133565 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 373
133564 What is the best place you have visited? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 210
133563 New year\'s resolution. ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 1
133562 12.28 homework ³ë*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 3
133561 . ¼Û*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-02 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04