¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½É*Áø
2024-07-11 703

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Due to global warming, Korea changed from four seasons to two.
In addition, in summer getting hotter than before. So It's so humid that as soon as I hang the laundry. it dries fast speed.
plus i can find mold or many kind of bugs every where in my house I kept watching it
I can feel how sweet cold of winter is.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello again, Mi Jin!

I'm sending you back your revised composition. I apprecaite your sending it. Please go over the corrections and alternative expressions provided. Speak to you again tomorrow! Have a good evening! 


Cheers,
Jean~~



                       

John Steinbeck asked, "What good is the warmth of summer, without the cold of winter to give it sweetness." Do we need winter so that we appreciate summer?


Due to global warming, Korea changed from four seasons to two.
>> Due to global warming, Korea has changed from having four seasons to two.

In addition, in summer getting hotter than before. 
>> In addition, summer is getting hotter than before. 

So It's so humid that as soon as I hang the laundry. 
>> It's so humid that I can feel the humidity as soon as I hang the laundry. 

it dries fast speed.
>> So it dries fast. 

plus i can find mold or many kind of bugs every where in my house I kept watching it
>>  Plus, I can find molds or many kinds of bugs everywhere in my house. 

I can feel how sweet cold of winter is.
>> NOTE: My apologies but I don't know what this means. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138260 What are the pros and cons of being in a nursing home? Do the... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-07-04 7
138259 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 1
138258 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 4
138257 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 971
138256 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 849
138255 2024.07.02 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 837
138254 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 3
138253 How much walking do you do every day? What useful things could... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 1011
138252 July 1st\'s homework ¾È*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 924
138251 Television or books È«*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 7
138250 What kinds of street food are popular in Korea? What kinds of... ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 780
138249 Why do some people lack clarity about their true life goals? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 897
138248 Illness ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 1070
138247 make it ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 2
138246 What is the most difficult part of studying English? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 1
138245 How do you feel when you think you are not prepared for something ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 1
138244 What is the most challenging part of your job? ¼Û*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 776
138243 Can horror stories also have themes or messages beyond just... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 899
138242 1.July.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 0
138241 2.July.2024 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-03 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04