¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How do someone\'s interests affect a person\'s life?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼Û*¶ó
2024-07-09 316

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Interests affect a person¡¯s life so much especially in terms of a refreshment.
When someone is interested in something new, they take a lot of time on it and they look forward to that interesting time.
Most of people involve their work so hard and take most of their daily time to their work in the company. As time goes by, they may get stress and take a hard time to accept new opinion or ideas from other people --- burn out.
At that time, interests make people to refresh and get a positive mind. It helps them improving their efficiency during working.
So, when the interests develop to a hobby, people can have a healthy way of release the stress.
Thtat¡¯s why I think getting interests to something new consistently is important.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Yura! I am delighted to know your thoughts about this topic. Keep it up! Have a great day!^^
~T. Jewel
Interests affect a person¡¯s life so much especially in terms of a refreshment.
>>Interests can significantly affect a person¡¯s life, especially in terms of providing refreshment.
OR
>>Interests affect a person¡¯s life greatly, especially in terms of providing relaxation.
When someone is interested in something new, they take a lot of time on it and they look forward to that interesting time.
>>When someone is interested in something new, they invest a lot of time in it and eagerly look forward to those enjoyable moments.
Most of people involve their work so hard and take most of their daily time to their work in the company.
>>Many people dedicate a significant time of their daily lives to their work.
As time goes by, they may get stress and take a hard time to accept new opinion or ideas from other people --- burn out.
>>As time goes by, they may become stressed, find it difficult to accept new opinions or ideas from others, and eventually burn out.
At that time, interests make people to refresh and get a positive mind. 
>>During these instances, interests make people feel refreshed and foster a positive mindset.
It helps them improving their efficiency during working.
>>It helps them improve their efficiency at work.
So, when the interests develop to a hobby, people can have a healthy way of release the stress.
>>So, when interests develop into a hobby, people can have a healthy way to release stress.
Thtat¡¯s why I think getting interests to something new consistently is important.
>>That's why I think consistently developing new interests is important.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
137652 Writing Task: What opinion would you present at a meeting about... ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-06 227
137651 HOMEWORK Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-06 212
137650 How does the perspective that obesity is the result of eating... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-06-06 156
137649 What do you think your midlife crisis will be like? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-06-06 163
137648 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 235
137647 Have you ever gotten lost while traveling? If so, tell me about... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 0
137646 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 104
137645 2024.06.05 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 0
137644 What do you usually do in the shopping mall? ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 229
137643 Pronouncing English words with so many vowel sounds ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 221
137642 My life in my workplace ÇÑ*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 15
137641 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 2
137640 Do you think fancy restaurants serve more delicious food than... ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 297
137639 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 0
137638 If you could have a conversation with any famous living person,... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 214
137637 What do you like to do with your free time? Do you prefer to... Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 270
137636 homework ±è*º° ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 2
137635 Some people think it¡¯s better to choose friends who always have... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 213
137634 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 225
137633 Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-05 403

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04