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Why do friendships fall apart?

작성자: 이*윤
2024-07-05 659

회원님의 영작문



Check the attached file, please.
Have a nice weekend!

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Yun!~
I assume you spent a lot of time on your homework. I appreciate you providing me with thorough compositions every time. Keep submitting good homework. 
Chammy

Well, there are many reasons.

First, it's a fight with a close friend.

When you hang out with people, you find differences and inevitably complain.

When there is a reason that causes complaints to build up or trigger a fight, we fight.

Correct

OR

>>Well, there are numerous causes. First, it is frequently due to a disagreement with a close friend. Spending time with people means that you will inevitably get into differences and encounter complaints. Conflict may arise when these issues intensify or start a quarrel.

Second, the envy and jealousy of my friends.

I think this reason is emerging as a serious social problem in Korea.

This is because, as Korea develops into an infinitely competitive society, more and more people perceive friends as competitors, not only friends.

There can be many things about envy and jealousy, and the majority of them are related to grades.

>>Correct

OR

>> The envy and jealousy of my friends comes in second. I believe that this cause is becoming a major social problem in Korea. This is because, as Korea evolves into a more competitive society, an increasing number of individuals see their friends as competitors rather than just friends. There are many different causes of envy and jealousy, but most of them have to do with rankings.

Third, it is the reason why friendship falls apart the most.

Our living spaces change as we get older.

It means that we are living in a sider boundary.

>>Correct

OR

>> Thirdly, it is the main cause of friendship failure. As we age, our living environments change. It indicates that the world in which we live is a smaller one.

For example, if you go from middle school to high school or graduate from high school and go to university, you will be active in a wider boundary, and your friendship can become distant as your physical distance increases.

Or

>> For example, if you move from middle school to high school or graduate from high school and attend university, you will be involved in a wider setting, and your friendship may become distant as your physical distance grows.

Also, as we live in society, we have less time to maintain friendship.

>> Also, as we live in society, we have less time to maintain friendships.

If you get to work at a company, you can't make friendships with your friends during work hours, and you don't have the strength to meet your friends because you get tired and work hours are all different.

>> If you get to work at a company, you can't make friends with your colleagues during work hours, and you don't have the strength to meet them because you are tired and work hours are all different.

That's why your friendship naturally falls apart from your friends.

>>Correct
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[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

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03
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