¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Some people think that it is fine for professional sportsmen and sportswomen to misbehave on or off

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2024-07-04 882

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I strongly disagree with the statement that it is fine for professional sportsmen and sportswomen to misbehave on or off the field, as long as they are playing well. It is really sad that the national law is not equal to everyone. We can easily see that rich or people who are in the higher position is not sentenced properly if they are involved in the crime. Although, the law should be applied to all people, poor people have experienced unfair results compared to rich people. Famous sports players and celebrities such as actors, singers and comedians also be treated well than general people due to their social status. However, people want to be treated with same standard if there are some incidents. We want famous people to be a role model for general people and they must be clear regarding moral issues because their behavior can influence the attitudes and actions of their followers.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good afternoon Mr. Hwang~! You have done a good job here of creating a structured and flowing argument. You have given reasons for your opinions, which help successfully develop your concepts! Keep it up!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I strongly disagree with the statement that it is fine for professional sportsmen and sportswomen to misbehave on or off the field, as long as they are playing well.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 It is really sad that the national law is not equal to everyone.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 We can easily see that rich or people who are in the higher position is not sentenced properly if they are involved in the crime. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
Although, the law should be applied to all people, poor people have experienced unfair results compared to rich people.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 Famous sports players and celebrities such as actors, singers and comedians also be treated well than general people due to their social status. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
However, people want to be treated with the same standard if there are some incidents.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 We want famous people to be a role model for general people and they must be clear regarding moral issues because their behavior can influence the attitudes and actions of their followers.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138328 Homework ½Å*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-07 6
138327 Homework À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-07 1048
138326 Expectations from the class ¾î*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-07 733
138325 In which jobs do people have to make very quick decisions based... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-07-07 1
138324 What do you usually do after our English class? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-07 1456
138323 The benefits of wearing uniforms in school ÀÌ*º° ¿Ï·á 2024-07-07 1
138322 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-07 0
138321 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-07-07 1
138320 Are there any disadvantages to being intelligent? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-07 879
138319 What do you see in the market near your house? Describe the... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-07-07 915
138318 Do you like to talk to the local people when you travel? Why or... Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-07 0
138317 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-07-06 1087
138316 Which one is better maratang or fried chicken? Why? ÃÖ*ÇÑ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-06 720
138315 What is the most annoying or amazing thing about children? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-07-05 0
138314 Grandma Moses ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-07-05 690
138313 What are the best ways to avoid getting sick? ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-07-05 780
138312 HOMEWORK Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-05 768
138311 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-05 1003
138310 Do you think electricity is the greatest invention ever? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-07-05 933
138309 2024.07.05 ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-07-05 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04