¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think it\'s good to have a big family?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Â÷*Áø
2024-06-30 871

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think it's good. Because not lonely, it's fun and have big house.
Played with my family it's fun and not lon1ely The house is big because many family members in there.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening, Yale!

Here's your revised homework. Many thanks for sending it. Please take a look at the few and minor revisions made. 
Have a good one!  


Cheers,
Jean~~




                                      Do you think it's good to have a big family?


I think it's good. Because not lonely, it's fun and have big house.
>> I think it's good because it¡¯s not lonely; it's fun and the family can live in a big house.

Played with my family it's fun and not lon1ely
>> If I had a big family, it would be fun and  I wouldn¡¯t be lonely. 

The house is big because many family members in there.
>> The house is big because many family members are living there. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
137458 Who in your family is in charge of the laundry? Is it considered... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-28 1249
137457 Learning Chinese ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-28 1164
137456 What are some challenges faced by historical relics and... ±è*¿í ¿Ï·á 2024-05-28 933
137455 Liaison ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-05-27 1013
137454 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-27 1
137453 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-27 0
137452 homework 05.27 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-05-27 1183
137451 What pizza flavor is your favorite? ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-05-27 1143
137450 Many people drink coffee to feel alert. Is there a better way to... ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-27 1153
137449 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-27 0
137448 Why is making eye contact important? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-05-27 889
137447 2024.05.24 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-05-27 850
137446 Is anger ever a good thing? If so, when? Why? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-05-27 1281
137445 What is your favorite subject in school? Why do you think so? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-05-27 1113
137444 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-27 2
137443 homework ±è*º° ¿Ï·á 2024-05-27 1
137442 Perfect weather °í*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-27 1016
137441 What challenges do people face when trying to become... ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-27 4
137440 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-27 1394
137439 Essay in my facvorite movie Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-27 1089

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04