무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

How important is beauty in your daily life?

작성자: 김*경
2024-06-24 436

회원님의 영작문

Beauty always makes me happy. When I see a good-looking person, masterpieces in the art gallery or beautiful nature in rural area, I feel good. Moreover, beauty is sometimes covert inside us, we just can feel it through kind words or behaviors. This kind of beauty also makes me happy as well.
Nowadays, beautiful designs couldn't be more important than ever. Cars, clothes, books, and many things can’t sold without good design. In some sense, good design is not an option but a must. For man, good looking has become one of competitiveness in relationship or business, which led to consensus that plastic surgery is not a taboo as it used to be in a country under the Confucianism which has forbidden people to impair the body from parents for a long time. However, beauty pageant has not be popular in Korea anymore because it had tendency to commercialize women’s beauty in the past. It doesn’t work in a gender-equal society.
In short, beauty has become one of my main interests.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Steve!
I completely agree that beauty in various forms, whether in people, nature, art, or design, has a profound impact on our well-being and happiness. It's fascinating how our appreciation of beauty has evolved, becoming essential in many aspects of life, from personal interactions to business. Your perspective on the significance of beauty is truly insightful. 
~ Trixia

Content:
Beauty always makes me happy.
- CORRECT.
When I see a good-looking person, masterpieces in the art gallery or beautiful nature in rural area, I feel good.
- When I see a good-looking person, masterpieces in the art gallery, or beautiful nature in a rural area, I feel good.
Moreover, beauty is sometimes covert inside us, we just can feel it through kind words or behaviors.
- Moreover, beauty is sometimes hidden inside us; we can just feel it through kind words or behaviors.
This kind of beauty also makes me happy as well.
- This kind of beauty also makes me happy.
Nowadays, beautiful designs couldn't be more important than ever.
- Nowadays, beautiful designs are more important than ever.
Cars, clothes, books, and many things can’t sold without good design.
- Cars, clothes, books, and many other things can't be sold without good design.
In some sense, good design is not an option but a must.
- CORRECT.
For man, good looking has become one of competitiveness in relationship or business, which led to consensus that plastic surgery is not a taboo as it used to be in a country under the Confucianism which has forbidden people to impair the body from parents for a long time.
- For men, being good-looking has become competitive in relationships or business, which led to the consensus that plastic surgery is not as taboo as it used to be in a country under Confucianism, which has forbidden people to impair their bodies from their parents for a long time.
However, beauty pageant has not be popular in Korea anymore because it had tendency to commercialize women’s beauty in the past.
- However, beauty pageants are not popular in Korea anymore because they have had a tendency to commercialize women’s beauty in the past.
It doesn’t work in a gender-equal society.
- CORRECT.
In short, beauty has become one of my main interests.
- CORRECT.
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
135071 Discuss the pros and cons of using public transportation versus... 이*태 완료 2024-02-28 683
135070 Think about a time when you helped someone. Describe the... 이*태 완료 2024-02-28 473
135069 Describe a piece of technology you find useful in your daily... 이*태 완료 2024-02-28 373
135068 Homework 윤*선 완료 2024-02-28 578
135067 Discuss your daily routine, including diet, exercise, and... 이*태 완료 2024-02-28 635
135066 Business expense request 염*예 완료 2024-02-28 2
135065 👍🏻 황*혜 완료 2024-02-28 393
135064 a stomach 민*정 완료 2024-02-28 1
135063 Why do you need a moblie phone? 박*현 완료 2024-02-28 399
135062 I going to talk about the famous places in korea 고*호 완료 2024-02-28 406
135061 What exotic food would you like to try? 신*섭 완료 2024-02-28 433
135060 Spend six months in Canada 박*율 완료 2024-02-28 467
135059 What is the best gift you have ever given to a friend? Why was... 박*호 완료 2024-02-28 666
135058 >> Give an example of a superstitious belief in Korea and... 이*민 완료 2024-02-28 2
135057 HOMEWORK 박*은 완료 2024-02-28 1
135056 HOMEWORK 박*은 완료 2024-02-28 2
135055 homework 이*수 완료 2024-02-28 540
135054 doctors 권*희 완료 2024-02-28 313
135053 I heard that some schools are shutting down in Korea, what does... 권*지 완료 2024-02-28 2
135052 What is your culture when you a neighbor just moved to your... 권*지 완료 2024-02-28 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]