무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

How important is beauty in your daily life?

작성자: 김*경
2024-06-24 385

회원님의 영작문

Beauty always makes me happy. When I see a good-looking person, masterpieces in the art gallery or beautiful nature in rural area, I feel good. Moreover, beauty is sometimes covert inside us, we just can feel it through kind words or behaviors. This kind of beauty also makes me happy as well.
Nowadays, beautiful designs couldn't be more important than ever. Cars, clothes, books, and many things can’t sold without good design. In some sense, good design is not an option but a must. For man, good looking has become one of competitiveness in relationship or business, which led to consensus that plastic surgery is not a taboo as it used to be in a country under the Confucianism which has forbidden people to impair the body from parents for a long time. However, beauty pageant has not be popular in Korea anymore because it had tendency to commercialize women’s beauty in the past. It doesn’t work in a gender-equal society.
In short, beauty has become one of my main interests.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Steve!
I completely agree that beauty in various forms, whether in people, nature, art, or design, has a profound impact on our well-being and happiness. It's fascinating how our appreciation of beauty has evolved, becoming essential in many aspects of life, from personal interactions to business. Your perspective on the significance of beauty is truly insightful. 
~ Trixia

Content:
Beauty always makes me happy.
- CORRECT.
When I see a good-looking person, masterpieces in the art gallery or beautiful nature in rural area, I feel good.
- When I see a good-looking person, masterpieces in the art gallery, or beautiful nature in a rural area, I feel good.
Moreover, beauty is sometimes covert inside us, we just can feel it through kind words or behaviors.
- Moreover, beauty is sometimes hidden inside us; we can just feel it through kind words or behaviors.
This kind of beauty also makes me happy as well.
- This kind of beauty also makes me happy.
Nowadays, beautiful designs couldn't be more important than ever.
- Nowadays, beautiful designs are more important than ever.
Cars, clothes, books, and many things can’t sold without good design.
- Cars, clothes, books, and many other things can't be sold without good design.
In some sense, good design is not an option but a must.
- CORRECT.
For man, good looking has become one of competitiveness in relationship or business, which led to consensus that plastic surgery is not a taboo as it used to be in a country under the Confucianism which has forbidden people to impair the body from parents for a long time.
- For men, being good-looking has become competitive in relationships or business, which led to the consensus that plastic surgery is not as taboo as it used to be in a country under Confucianism, which has forbidden people to impair their bodies from their parents for a long time.
However, beauty pageant has not be popular in Korea anymore because it had tendency to commercialize women’s beauty in the past.
- However, beauty pageants are not popular in Korea anymore because they have had a tendency to commercialize women’s beauty in the past.
It doesn’t work in a gender-equal society.
- CORRECT.
In short, beauty has become one of my main interests.
- CORRECT.
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
136047 cheer up 민*정 완료 2024-04-02 2
136046 What do you enjoy most about school and why? 에*미 완료 2024-04-02 2
136045 What do you do in the minutes before you sleep? Does it help you... 박*은 완료 2024-04-02 162
136044 Homework 권*윤 완료 2024-04-02 3
136043 What have you lost while traveling? 박*진 완료 2024-04-02 231
136042 Homework 윤*선 완료 2024-04-02 250
136041 Homework 류*우 완료 2024-04-02 152
136040 Homework 박*혜 완료 2024-04-02 228
136039 WRITING TASK: What can you do for people who have sleeping... 임*지 완료 2024-04-02 7
136038 What advice would you give someone considering getting a pet for... 김*현 완료 2024-04-02 4
136037 What do you think about taking a nap? How about sleeping in? 오*현 완료 2024-04-02 405
136036 What are your thoughts on the safety issues in your city? 서*연 완료 2024-04-02 325
136035 homework 이*수 완료 2024-04-02 230
136034 Vocabulary 임*진 완료 2024-04-02 538
136033 HW 나*진 완료 2024-04-02 501
136032 Which skills do you think you need to be an excellent table... 박*호 완료 2024-04-02 174
136031 Best piece of advice 양*연 완료 2024-04-02 133
136030 Is gender discrimination an issue in Korea? Why do you think so? 김*지 완료 2024-04-02 4
136029 How is your home decorated? 오*소 완료 2024-04-02 1
136028 Describe a gift you recently gave to someone. 오*소 완료 2024-04-02 32

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]